Testimony of Healing November 5, 1938 Issue

Christian Science came into my life at the turn of the new...

Marian V. Loud

Christian Science came into my life at the turn of the new century, and so completely changed my outlook that I was veritably born again. For seven years prior to my healing in Christian Science, I had been under almost constant care of physicians, and in my senior year in high school I was forced to drop out on account of my health. During the months following, I grew so despondent that my parents considered having an attendant care for me. All this was quickly changed by Christian Science. My mind was filled with joyful anticipation, and my religious aspirations were satisfied. I returned to school and took full part in all class activities. Since that time there has been no necessity to employ medical methods of healing, and I have not been confined to my bed for more than a few hours at a time.

Ten years ago, while I was traveling with friends in the south of France, symptoms appeared which alarmed me greatly, as they seemed to indicate the presence of a malignant disease which had been the cause of my mother's passing on some years before under medical treatment. Realizing that a latent fear was asserting itself, I tried to keep calm and to conceal my distress from my companions. Although my plan had been to remain abroad for more than a year, I resolved to return to America as soon as possible. To reach the nearest port of embarkation, it was necessary to break my journey at a city where, I discovered, there was the only registered practitioner south of Paris. Under the loving ministrations of this worker, I was led to see that the laws of God were as operative in Europe as in the United States, and I decided to stay and work out the problem there. The intense nervousness and mental anguish that had made it almost impossible to eat or sleep were immediately allayed, but the physical condition persisted, which surprised me very much, as I usually responded to treatment quickly. Analyzing my thought, I found that I was entertaining the belief that I was different from others who had been healed of this disease. In short, that I was unique; that I had a selfhood separate from God. This thought corrected, my state distinctly improved. Yet the evidence remained unchanged. At this point a kind of pity for the faithful practitioner filled my thought and, out of consideration for her, I resolved to begin our interviews with the best report possible. This served to awaken gratitude for such progress as had been made, and there was a consequent improvement in my condition. Painful reminders, however, continued to occur, although at longer intervals, and one day, rising above a sense of despair, I cried out: "What does it matter whether I work this out on this plane or hereafter? It is the eternal problem of knowing that life and intelligence are spiritual which is being solved!" As I placed the desire to know Truth before the wish to be physically at ease, my consciousness became sufficiently clear for me to get the message that the practitioner had been giving me, and I was healed. Just when the physical manifestation disappeared I do not know, but, when I had occasion to think of it, I found I was free. This was about three weeks after beginning treatment.

Our Leader writes in Science and Health (p. 460): "Sickness is neither imaginary nor unreal,—that is, to the frightened, false sense of the patient. Sickness is more than fancy; it is solid conviction." Not only was an image of morbid thought replaced by a truer concept of Life, but many faults of temperament were corrected, and I was aroused to a more consecrated study of our Lesson-Sermons in the Christian Science Quarterly, our periodicals, and Mrs. Eddy's writings.

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