In 1921 I was confronted with...

In 1921 I was confronted with a malignant disease which took twelve years of continual study and application of the truth on my part, and also considerable assistance from others, to heal. During this seemingly interminable period I had many proofs of God's dear love and kindness, but the main problem remained virulent, with almost incessant pain during wakeful hours. When the disease was apparently at one of its worst phases, the healing was gained overnight. Why it yielded then, I did not appreciate until later.

From my present viewpoint I can see that there are never any real reasons for protracted healings. The arguments which claimed the ability to stop God's will for man in my case were three. I was unwilling to stop fighting evil as something real; I accepted a false sense of martyrdom, believing that punishment was the only means of canceling crime; and I held stubbornly to an unreasoning and intense dislike for human organization. Now I can see that the healing came with mortal mind's complete exhaustion of its belief in its own resources.

God's message to the inhabitants of Judah was (II Chron. 20:15), "The battle is not your's, but God's;" and our Leader, Mrs. Eddy, describes her own experience as follows (Miscellaneous Writings, pp. 179, 180): "In 1866, when God revealed to me this risen Christ, this Life that knows no death, that saith, 'Because he lives, I live.' I awoke from the dream of Spirit in the flesh so far as to take the side of Spirit, and strive to cease my warfare." This should have been my strife then, "to cease my warfare" against evil as real, as it is becoming my only strife today.

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THE NEW BIRTH
December 4, 1948
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