Before coming to Christian Science I had been very unhappy...

Before coming to Christian Science I had been very unhappy all my life. I tried hard to do right and be contented, but I drifted farther away and found nothing but discouragement. I took a wrong step which disgraced me publicly, and this experience brought the error before me as an obstacle which I thought I could never surmount. "Stripped of its coverings, what a mocking spectacle is sin!" (Science and Health, p. 241). I thoroughly understood that there was nothing to be gained in wrong-doing and all to be lost, also that one cannot stand still but will get deeper and deeper in the mire. With this shadow about me there seemed to be nothing more to live for; but I decided to leave all behind, go to a strange city, and try again. The thought came to me so often that God would help me if I did what was right, although I knew nothing about God, for the ideas that had been given to me in Sunday school I could not accept. With the advice of my husband, who was very reasonable under the circumstances, I went to a city where I knew no one except a young lady whom I had met in a business way, to ask her to help me find work and a place to stay. To my surprise she took me in as she would have welcomed an own sister, and her method of reasoning brought me such peace and comfort that life seemed easier to live.

When I had told my story, she asked me if I was willing to do right. I answered that I was both willing and anxious, but could never go back to my husband, for we had been very unhappy together; however, if I could understand that it was right I would, though I doubted if I ever would understand. I soon realized that this young lady was living as taught by Christian Science, so I attended the services. I thought it all very beautiful, but felt that it was not for me, as I had done wrong. Nevertheless, in a short time I had "Science and Health with Key to the Scriptures" by Mrs. Eddy, also a Bible, and was studying, for I had been told that the study of this truth (with understanding) would make me happy. When I began to understand that sin is forgiven when forsaken, a great weight was lifted from my shoulders and I had new hope. After about a year of faithful study I understood that my place was with my husband. I had read the chapter on Marriage in Science and Health many times, and I began to understand these words: "Happiness is spiritual, born of Truth and Love. It is unselfish; therefore it cannot exist alone, but requires all mankind to share it" (p. 57). As my husband had become interested in this healing truth, I knew we could help each other. Since then my husband and I have been healthier and happier than ever before. The greater difficulties have been cleared away, and even strangers remark about how well we get along together.

August 28, 1915

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