I desire to express my appreciation and gratitude for...

William G. Crabbe

I desire to express my appreciation and gratitude for what Christian Science has done for me and is doing today. About four years ago I took up the study of Science and Health and followed its teachings for one year with varied experiences. I studied the Lesson-Sermons, and went to the services Wednesdays and Sundays. During that year I had many physical ailments, and in each and all cases when I asked for help I always received it; but soon some other ailment would appear.

I became discouraged and decided that while Christian Science was a good thing for some, it was not of any use to me, and that I would discontinue the reading and my attendance at church. I arrived at this conclusion at a Wednesday evening meeting. At that meeting two testimonies were given with which I disagreed. The first was to the effect that when a person conscientiously investigates Christian Science, he rarely if ever gives it up. The other testimony expressed thankfulness for the physical healing, but much more for the spiritual uplift. I disagreed with this for the reason that I was only looking for freedom from all my aches and pains and I did not realize what was meant when the term "spiritual uplift" was used; so I discontinued my reading and attending church, and put away all my Christian Science literature.

Soon after this I developed a case of bronchial asthma (I had had some bronchial trouble for many years). I was examined by three physicians, two of whom I had known for years, and the diagnosis of each was as above stated. I doctored with them for three months, working daytimes and sitting by an open window at night in order to get air enough to breathe. How I dreaded to see the long night come on. Yet there never was a time when I did not know that God would heal me, if I asked in the right way; but I had my own opinion as to how this healing was to be done, and I did not want to give in. I was willing to compromise on some few things, without acknowledging God as All-in-all or as a God who is Love.

I continued to take medicine for three months with no results. I had overheard some of my companions remark that I was going to die, and I was sure of it myself, yet I continued to take medicine until one Friday afternoon, when I realized it was no use to fight any longer. I knew where I could get help, and there was no argument about that now! I went to the doctor's office, paid my bill, went to my room and threw away all the medicine, etc., acknowledged God as All-in-all, and as a little child asked divine Love for the help that never fails. I telephoned a Christian Science practitioner, told her of my condition,—that I had not had a night's sleep for three months; that two hours was as long as I could stay in bed, generally from ten o'clock until midnight, and that I must have some help. The reply was an assurance that there was no reason why I should not rest; that there was no power to harm me, "for God is infinite, all-power, all Life, Truth, Love" (Science and Health, p. 17). I replied that I knew this, but that I had never been ready to acknowledge it before.

I went to bed as usual about ten; was up and read for a while at two, also at five, and at eight o'clock I got up feeling good, also satisfied with the results of the absent treatment. The next night I retired at the usual time, went to sleep immediately, and when I awoke and looked at my watch I found I had slept nearly twelve hours. Oh, the joy, the peace, the harmony of it all! For the first time I knew what was meant by "spiritual uplift," and with tears of humility and deep joy I was able to say the one word, "Master!" That was not much to say for all that Love had done, but it meant a great deal to me. I had tried so hard to get away from God and Christian Science, but the arms of omnipresent Love were ever round and about me, leading me gently, tenderly, lovingly all along the pathway and finally bringing me home to our Father-Mother God, and to the peace "that passeth all understanding."

It was a long hard road of my own choosing, and it seemed to me I tried all of the side-tracks ere I came into the straight and narrow path, so I had to go back and begin all over again to learn the lesson, "Except ye become as little children." For three years I have been absolutely well, have not taken medicine of any kind, and today I desire to testify to my entire agreement with the two testimonies which I rejected in my earlier experience in Christian Science.

William G. Crabbe, Grand Rapids, Mich.

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