Article December 4, 2006 Issue

THE BLESSING: A HAPPY PEACE, WITHOUT PAUSE

BY PARTRICIA KADICK

SATURDAY promised bright skies, clean, deep-packed snow. The trails were nearby and well groomed—ready for beginner, intermediate, and advanced skier. Perfect, at last, for a rare family outing to cross-country ski.

Though I felt pretty accomplished, and relished any chance to be out there, I'd stopped alpine skiing partly out of fear of tearing down a hill, at any speed. (It had become my habit to pause at the top—and the pauses were getting longer and longer.) So when I skied on my own, I'd tend to choose cross-country trails with few steep hills or sharp turns. Yet I knew that on Saturday those trails would not satisfy our two sons (or their dad), who'd be out of sight before I even had my skis on!

Beyond just the concern over the skiing, other mental baggage had to be routed as well—like feeling out of touch with the boys, and perhaps with my own purpose and future. And such troubling issues fed my imagination with insecurities.

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