Article April 14, 2003 Issue

Persistent love melts resentment

By Marta Greenwood—London, England

Is it so hard to love someone who hates and rejects you because you are different? I may have come from the East and my husband-to-be from the West. And we might have come from different cultures, but we had common values in the way we were brought up and lived.

So it was a great shock to see the reaction of my fiance's family when I was introduced to them. Of course they were kind and welcoming to me as an individual, but they had high aspirations for their gifted son. Marrying a girl from Iran was not one of them. They were bitterly disappointed and totally opposed to our marriage. I was equally offended. I was proud of my upbringing and of my country.

I was brought up with Christian values. And coupled with the fact that I was no quitter, I couldn't accept this unfair treatment because I was "different" or "unsuitable" in some way. I soon realized the only answer to prejudice or hostility of any kind was to build bridges of love and trust. By doing so, we could get to know each other better and come to understand each other's traditions.

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