Testimony of Healing March 14, 1903 Issue

"What shall I render unto the Lord for all his benefits...

R. C. P.

"What shall I render unto the Lord for all his benefits toward me?" What, indeed, unless it be my "vows" in the presence of all his people; in other words, the addition of my testimony to that of the ever-increasing company of those who have stepped boldly to the front in life's arena, proclaiming: "As for me and my house, we will serve the Lord!" It is two years since I fully and freely said in my heart, "God forbid that we should forsake the Lord to serve other gods!" It is with a heart full of love and overflowing with thanksgiving and praise that I take up my pen to speak of the wonders of God's grace. For a long time there had been dawning upon me an ever-deepening sense of something so wofully wrong that I determined to seek, with all my heart, for the inner meaning of the truth that makes "free indeed." The accepted interpretation of God's word did not meet all its requirements, neither did it fulfil for me all that was claimed for it. From time to time there came faint glimpses of something that pointed to a fixed law, definite, absolute; thus, while groping in a half dazed way, I grew into a conscious belief that it was man's conception not God's purpose that was at fault; in fact, I became a skeptic, though it was not God's, but man's, interpretation that I doubted. Yet, how foolish I often felt when I found myself arraying my ideas and questions against the centuries of thought and study of master minds. During my transitions from belief to belief, and from one position in faith to another (all of which I soon learned were shifting sands) I had many an uplifting and soul-refreshing season when thought and pen were busy, there were times of eager seeking, silent waiting, of "standing still" and pressing forward for a broader vision of the something (unnamed) that I was so sure led to light, joy, and the promised understanding (I John, 5:20), which I was persuaded was so near, yet veiled in a mist through which my mortal gaze could not penetrate. My frequent departures into new fields of thought and research, my wanderings over the latitude and longitude of dogmas, creeds, and isms, became a source of amusement to my friends and the despair of my would be religious guides. From every avenue along life's highway came experiences laden with truth-bearing seed, until, in the fulness of time, I was called to silently learn of divine Principle. Right here I wish to emphasize the importance of an understanding of the allness of divine Principle. It is that which is All-in-all. The outward demonstration is the witness of the inward spiritual grace, a natural sequence of our spiritual birthright. Never shall I forget the utter abandonment of that hour when it seemed as though every inch of ground had been surveyed and condemned. Without prop or stay, I just let go, and, in all due reverence, but with a most heartfelt earnestness exclaimed, "God, it's just you and I now." I assure the reader I meant no irreverence,—it was the only way in which I knew how to voice my extreme limit, the end of all things, as it seemed to me. Was it the rending of the veil that had been hiding the Shekinah? The earthquake and whirlwind, had fulfilled their mission, and now a still, small voice wooed me into the garden of Truth and Love, where I met my risen Lord. To my cry of "Rabboni" the sweet music of the answer ever lingers, a soul-refreshing strain, a living, vital, ever-present testimony of the cancelled tomb, and resurrection. I heard the "Come forth," but the grave-clothes of material sense still impeded my progress.

At this stage of my experience, and in the providence of divine Love, some of God's faithful ones crossed my path. Now comes the most astonishing part. I was bitterly opposed to Christian Science. I had read and heard the opinion of others and believed that I was verily doing God service in denouncing it on every occasion, for I misunderstood its teachings, and they seemed to undermine the very principles of the Christian religion, but the love and knowledge "which passeth all understanding" was not always to be anchored to error.

Have you ever been in a foreign country where for days not one familiar word was heard, and then have unexpectedly caught the sound of your native tongue? How you start! What a wave of pleasure envelopes you! Thus it was that I first overheard a remark dropped by a Christian Scientist which I caught as when one listens to a dear and familiar strain. I began to ask questions, then I studied the Bible to see how the answers and the Word agreed. A natural sense of justice, tempered by the late revelation of divine Love, led me to look into this new religion with the same interest and thought that I had given to others, so I ventured to invest in a copy of Science and Health.

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