Too shy to make friends?

"Little by little, I became relaxed and more friendly, and finally, a loving person."

Mary Lee S. O'Neal

When I was very young, I was so shy that even the tall shelves of canned goods in the grocery store made me cry, according to my mother. This shyness and timidity lasted for many years. It was a tremendous obstacle, because my family moved every two or three years. Entering a succession of new schools and constantly facing a sea of strange faces was a daunting experience.

How many times I had to walk into a huge school cafeteria with a tray of food, wondering where to sit. No one would look at me or offer me a seat. If I saw someone I recognized from a classroom, I would ask if I could join the table. Sometimes I found a friend. Many times I did not. The next day I would have to start all over.

I remember talking to a Sunday School teacher about this. She discerned that self-consciousness gripped me. She helped me understand that reaching out to others would lift the self-absorption. And she added, "God's child is loving, lovable, and loved," which helped me in turning my thought away from myself as someone who needed to be liked and appreciated by others. I was already loved and appreciated by God, who made me. "The Lord hath appeared of old unto me, saying, Yea, I have loved thee with an everlasting love: therefore with lovingkindness have I drawn thee" (Jer. 31:3).

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