God led me to an internship
Junior year of college can be difficult. Life starts to feel serious: You see some of your close friends and peers succeeding in life, sometimes in areas where you feel you’re lacking. Mom and Dad are repeatedly asking if you’ve applied for internships and what you want your life to look like after walking the graduation stage.
The idea of spending my final college summer in a fast food restaurant for the fourth year in a row made my mind race with anxiety. It felt like my professional life would end before it had even begun if I didn’t land a summer internship.
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It felt like my professional life would end before it had even begun if I didn’t land a summer internship.
During the first half of my junior year, I was blessed to have the opportunity to study abroad in Madrid. But even while I was enjoying my time there, exploring the city and meeting new people, lining up an internship was never far from my thoughts. When I heard that a close friend had applied to four internships in just one night, I started comparing myself to them, and it didn’t feel good.
One of the first things I remember learning in Christian Science Sunday School was the Ten Commandments in the Bible, and this situation brought to mind the Tenth Commandment: “Thou shalt not covet” (Exodus 20:17). To covet means to feel envious or to want what someone else has. While it was easy for me to understand this intellectually, it was hard not to feel envious, since my own plans were still unclear.
Uncertain of what to look for and where I wanted to end up, I frantically searched for employment. After applying for countless internships and getting nothing but radio silence, I was even more fearful.
One late night, I was feeling overwhelmed, with no clear sense of direction. So I called my mom for advice.
After listening to me rant for a while, she reassured me with a couple of familiar and helpful Christian Science ideas: that all was well, and that I’d find my right place. She suggested applying for an internship at The First Church of Christ, Scientist, in Boston, and I gave it some thought. Before getting off the phone, she also shared this idea from Science and Health with Key to the Scriptures by Mary Baker Eddy: “There is neither place nor opportunity in Science for error of any sort” (pp. 232–233).
At first, I thanked her but brushed it off. My mind was still overrun with worry. But after ending the call, I walked around the city and let the idea that I can’t be anywhere but my right place marinate.
I had been feeling like maybe there was something wrong with me because I hadn’t yet figured out what I should be doing. But it occurred to me that I am God-created and totally individual and that there’s no shame if it takes time to understand my spiritual identity and who I truly am. I also remembered from my study of Christian Science that nothing and no one is imperfect, because God is perfect, and He created us in His image and likeness. God is also constantly guiding every one of us, so I didn’t have to stress or be afraid.
Uncertainty can seem daunting, but it can be overcome by leaning on God and knowing that He’s got the reins.
Grounded in this new understanding, I submitted my application to intern in Boston as suggested by my mom. After getting confirmation that it had been received, I felt a wave of serenity wash over me. All of my previous worries about where I’d end up completely vanished, and by the time I had finished my second interview, I was confident that this was exactly the place I needed to be.
Uncertainty can seem daunting, but it can be overcome by leaning on God, good, and knowing that He’s got the reins. Now I really do know that I’m always in my right place.