From the darkness of fear into the light of God's love

My mother often visited a very dear friend of hers, and as a child I loved to go with her. Something about this woman, who was a Christian Scientist, was so appealing. When she opened the door, such warmth and love greeted us.

At times the conversation was about faith, and I used to listen to the encouraging words. Her words touched on Bible stories and how the book Science and Health explains the meaning of these beautiful stories, bringing a fresh thought about life itself, about God’s love for us. These thoughts have always stayed with me, and have helped me many times. Thinking about this more deeply I now realize I was opening my thought, in a childlike way, to the spiritual truths of God.

A few months after I’d been hearing these inspiring truths, I was awakened by my mother calling out. She had discovered someone in her bedroom. Thinking it might be my sister, she had tried to put the light on, but it didn’t work. Evidently the intruder had tampered with the connection. Shortly afterward, we heard a motorcycle drive off from our driveway.

My father called the police, and together with my father they searched around the house. But they found nothing missing, as Mother must have disturbed the burglar, and he had fled. My dear mother was so upset that my father suggested we move into another house. This we did a few months later and settled nicely in a town some distance away.

This experience drew me nearer to our loving Father-Mother God, and my prayers became deeper. But, although I didn't make the connection until much later, this childhood incident left me with a deep fear of the dark that was espeically severe when I was alone.

Many years went by. I left school and went into the fashion business, where I got a job in a fashion showroom with a small family concern. The lovely thing was that these dear people were Christian Scientists, and I felt the same warm atmosphere that I had felt so many years before as a child. They had a wonderful approach to life, and it was such a happy atmosphere to work in.

Finding that we lived about four miles from a Church of Christ, Scientist, I decided to go along the following Sunday to the morning service. I was warmly greeted at the door, and afterward I asked about the book Science and Health with Key to the Scriptures by Mary Baker Eddy, which is used along with the Bible in these services.

I was shown into a delightful Reading Room where there was an abundance of religious books. I was able to purchase the book I so needed. This book was to light up my understanding more and more.

I began attending church each Sunday, and also went to the Wednesday evening testimony meetings, where people talked about the wonderful healings they had experienced through following the teachings of Christian Science. This was such a joy and so uplifting, that I became a member of this church.

Eventually I got married and started a fashion business of my own. I took an empty shop and with God’s guidance I built it up into a thriving business. It was a lovely growing time for me.

Sometimes my husband had to go away on business, and one evening in the winter when he was away, I was walking home from work in the dark. On passing a wooded area, an awful fear came upon me. All the trees seemed to have taken on dreadful shapes.

I managed to get to the gate of my house, but could go no further, stopped by the prospect of walking up the long garden path in the darkness. I just stood there, praying as best I could.

At that moment, I saw a light across the road. The woman who stabled her horses near my house was carrying a storm lantern—a welcome sight. She kindly brought her lantern over to light the way up the darkened path, and waited a moment while I opened the door. I thanked her with a hug and she left.

I closed the door and leaned my back on it with mixed feelings. At first I was cross with myself for being fearful. Then I was determined to overcome this unnatural dread. After all, I had learned from my study of Christian Science that fear is only an illusion. And I knew that, in reality, those trees were beautiful, giving joy to those who walked beneath their branches.

I was suddenly overwhelmed with gratitude for this beauty right on our doorstep. Mrs. Eddy wrote in Science and Health, “Beauty is a thing of life, which dwells forever in the eternal Mind and reflects the charms of His goodness in expression, form, outline, and color.” What a beautiful statement! I felt the warmth of God’s loving care as I made my supper and went to bed.

And as I snuggled down between the sheets, I was singing the words from Hymn 139 in the Christian Science Hymnal: “… No more I suffer cruel fear, / I feel God’s presence with me here ….”

The second verse is:

Who walks with Love along the way,
Shall talk with Love and Love obey;
God’s healing truth is free to all,
Our Father answers every call;
’Tis He dispels the clouds of gray
That all may walk with Love today.

I began thinking about some of the brave characters in the Bible. Daniel had a vision at the side of the river Hiddekel, and he heard a voice telling him, “Fear not, Daniel: for from the first day that thou didst set thine heart to understand … thy words were heard, and I am come for thy words.” This message was for me just as it was for Daniel. In Science and Health Mary Baker Eddy wrote, “The understanding, even in a degree, of the divine All-power destroys fear, and plants the feet in the true path,—the path which leads to the house built without hands ‘eternal in the heavens.’”

I knew that God loved me and was taking care of me, as He does all His children. This was such a comfort, and showed me that all was well. The next morning, when I awoke, I knew I was healed of this fear. The trees in the wood were full of birds singing—and I was singing too. This was a great step forward and opened up many new opportunities. Christian Science became a way of life for me. My business expanded as I began each day knowing that it was God’s day, with only the unfoldment of good.

To me, this progress illustrates the statement in Science and Health, “Spiritual attainments open the door to a higher understanding of the divine Life.”

The one God, who made all, gives only good. As we open the door of thought to the light of Life, we realize the truth of the words in Revelation, “Behold, I stand at the door, and knock: if any man hear my voice, and open the door, I will come in to him, and will sup with him, and he with me.” God will give us spiritual food (understanding), and He sups with us as we open our hearts to this understanding. What a comforting thought!

Understanding destroys fear:

Science and Health
247:21-24
454:5-9
10:15

King James Bible
Dan. 10:12 Fear
Rev. 3:20