I HAD COUNTLESS female role models when I was growing up. They were intelligent, beautiful, athletic, strong, and independent. These individuals were, to me, ideal women. They were my mom, summer-camp counselors, professors, even my own friends. They had it all. There was nothing they couldn't do in my eyes, and it seemed they needed permission from no one! As clichéd as it sounds, they were my heroes.

As a Christian Scientist, I'd learned early on that we are all (men and women) children of a Father-Mother God, made spiritual and equally perfect in God's image and likeness, based on the Biblical account of creation in the first chapter of Genesis. But for some reason I thought I wasn't as "perfect" as the women I looked up to. Maybe I could strive for "pretty good," but "perfect"—well, that seemed way out of my league. You might say that I felt that my lifeline, my heritage, was different from these other women, whom I saw so clearly as the daughters of God.

The thing is, I didn't even realize how prohibitive and limiting my thinking was, until a few years ago when this less-than-ideal perception of myself all came to the surface. One evening, I was eating dinner in my apartment when I noticed my roommate's copy of a popular women's magazine sitting on the table. As I read the front cover, I remember thinking the headlines claimed to have all the answers to women's issues and relationship problems. But it was all starting from the wrong premise—a limited, sensual view. I thought, "It'll never get us anywhere."

I realized that this false premise was really just the modern-day twist on the Adam-and-Eve model of creation found in Genesis 2 in the Bible. In this account, both man and woman are presented as fallen from grace. But in that same moment, I paused and asked myself, "Do I have a much more elevated view of myself?" To be honest, I had to say no.

During that time, it felt that things in my life were falling apart around me. In addition to a series of personal crises, I was lonely and longed for a relationship. But I felt I was hopeless for all kinds of reasons. At the same time, my eating habits were questionable at best. I'd lost a lot of weight—in part, simply because my student lifestyle had changed and I was busy. But I was continuing to lose even more. I enjoyed people's compliments, and it almost became a game to see how low my pant size could go.

That moment at the dinner table was a significant wake-up call for me. A line from Science and Health syncs up with my thoughts at the time: "Neither sympathy nor society should ever tempt us to cherish error in any form, and certainly we should not be error's advocate" (pp. 153–154). I realized that I had, unknowingly, been acting as error's advocate. In this case, "error" would be a false view of myself, coming through persistent thoughts arguing for acceptance—the idea that women are flawed mortals, struggling through life. I'd unknowingly gotten trapped into a matter-based, essentially physical, view of myself, particularly concerning my identity.

Every time I looked in the mirror and was dissatisfied with my appearance, every time I accepted that I was anything less than the perfect image and likeness of God, every time I measured my worth by my appearance, I was "cherishing error" in various forms. Something had to change. And I so badly wanted it to!

From that point forward, I committed myself to being on constant mental alert for thoughts that would pull me down to an imperfect, mortal model of women. Whether it was in the media or in conversations with friends, I began to mentally reject this model and "trade up" for a more spiritual sense of womanhood.

Over the next few months, as I prayed about this, I learned countless spiritual lessons about what it means to be the loved daughter of God. Four ideas stand out from all the rest:

1. There are no inferior children of the one and only God. All of God's ideas are made in His/Her image and likeness. There are no haves and have nots. This meant that I could love and appreciate the wonderful qualities I saw in my role models. And I could realize that their goodness did not rule out my own. Perfection was the divine standard, and we all hit the mark.

2. As daughters of God we are constantly reflecting God's omniaction. In other words, we reflect all that God is and does. I'd been repeatedly frustrated by stories and statistics I was hearing about women's confining career opportunities, and their having to make sacrifices because of raising children. Though I wasn't at a point in my life where this was a relatable scenario, I was feeling more and more that I was being pulled in every direction and that ultimately I was going to be faced with roadblocks. But the more I prayed, the more I learned that my purpose belonged to God and God alone, and there could be no competing tasks. I could trust God to establish my path, and expect that the Creator loves His/Her children equally. There didn't have to be any kind of trade-off or unfair side effects from that love.

3. True independence is total dependence on God. I always admired how independent my role models were—single, married, or dating. They were their own women. But I realized that often, as I looked up to my mentors, I wasn't exactly admiring spiritual independence. I was beginning to see independence wasn't defined by the fact that someone could change a tire or build shelves (even though I think those are wonderful skills to have!). Instead, those women I knew all reflected the fullness of God—through the expression of both male and female qualities, including strength, gentleness, wisdom, beauty, and adeptness. These qualities weren't owned exclusively by these individuals, but were a part of everyone's spiritual nature.

4. Similarly, men and women are not opposites from "Mars and Venus," as the saying goes. We all actually draw on the same foundation of spiritual qualities from divine Love. Therefore, it is impossible for men and women to be fundamentally at odds with one another. Likewise, it is also impossible that men and women are dependent on one another for satisfaction, completion, and happiness.

What is interesting, although perhaps not surprising, is that as I committed to living these ideas I was learning, as well as claiming them in my prayers for everyone, there were remarkable changes in my own life. Though I'd put relationships on hold while I tried to get my life sorted out, I met someone in a most unexpected way. The relationship was easy and natural, and continues to grow. My eating habits normalized, and my weight became stable.

Now, every day provides me with new opportunities to live these lessons. I've found a greater sense of confidence, and a more enduring satisfaction, even in the midst of challenges that arise. Considering this idea of women's worth is helping me progress spiritually by leaps and bounds. CSS

Inge Schmidt is a graduate student at Yale University.