Article August 20, 2007 Issue

FREE OF GRIEF'S HOLD

A conversation about healing broken hearts

Do we have to learn to live with grief? Or is there a way to break the hold of loss and emptiness? What can help with subtler forms of grief, such as "empty-nest syndrome"? LEIGH RUSSELL DAUGHERTY, a Christian Science practitioner and teacher in Nashua, New Hampshire, talked about these questions with fellow teacher and practitioner JOHN QUINCY ADAMS, III, of New York City. Here's an edited transcript of their conversation.

Leigh Daugherty: John, grief is so often associated with something that people have to go through in stages, in order to accept and come to terms with loss. What have you found that has been helpful in healing grief?

John Adams: Well, Leigh, the Bible tells us of Jesus' disciples grieving over his crucifixion until he showed himself after his resurrection. At first, they found his being alive hard to believe until they were able to actually touch his flesh. Then, they realized that even death had no power over God's son. I think this elevated their thought to the possibility of life actually being eternal. Earlier in his ministry Jesus had stated, "If a man keep my saying, he shall never see death" (John 8:51). I read that to mean, if one practices Jesus' life of selfless giving and divine healing—challenging material life and giving up mortal impulses that might provide short-term satisfaction but would also limit one's experience—in a very real sense one is already living eternally. And death loses its fearful hold. It's this increased understanding of life being forever that enlarges one's understanding, and holds oneself and others in an infinite light.

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