Article December 27, 2004 Issue

NO LONGER LONELY

By Gloria Onyuru

From the very beginning, it seemed as though my life were programmed for loneliness. I was the only child of a divorced mother who worked outside the home while I spent much time at home alone. After finishing high school, I attended a university in the midwestern United States where I met a nice guy and married him, thinking that his companionship would help me feel complete and loved. And, yes, my dear husband, Yalcin, did love me. He cared for me in many ways.

But after our first son was born, we moved overseas to my husband's homeland, Turkey, where 99.9 percent of the population is Muslim. I knew next to nothing about Islam, having been raised in Christianity. The religious differences turned out to be a daunting challenge, and I was totally unprepared to face it.

When we arrived, I couldn't speak Turkish (except for being able to count to ten), and had no idea about Turkey's history or culture. I had no friends or neighbors to speak English with and tried to learn Turkish by practicing it with my husband at home. The country had not yet started television broadcasting, and we had no telephone. A telephone line could have been purchased on the black market, but it was too expensive for us to afford, so we applied in the regular way and received a line—ten years later.