How can I keep from singing?
Every summer I attend a camp for Christian Scientists and take part in the musical theater program. It brings me so much joy to be up on that stage singing, dancing, and acting.
One day, though, about a week and a half into camp, I wasn’t feeling like my normal, joyful self. It was a particularly hot week, and we had been dancing and singing outside in the heat for several hours. My throat felt scratchy; I was dizzy; and my energy was drained. I decided to go to the care house, which is a facility at camp where we can receive treatment through prayer from a Christian Science practitioner and practical care from Christian Science nurses.
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We had been dancing and singing outside in the heat for several hours. My throat felt scratchy; I was dizzy; and my energy was drained.
I knew that I wanted to turn to God for help, so once I got to the care house, I went into one of the rooms and began listening to hymns from the Christian Science Hymnal: Hymns 430–603. As I sat there listening, I did an exercise I had learned in Christian Science Sunday School when I was a kid, which was to draw “my spiritual self” on paper. This is where I draw a picture of myself and then fill the space around it with spiritual qualities that I express. I’ve learned in Sunday School that spiritual qualities come from God, who is Spirit, and that these qualities make up our true identity.
As I was drawing, a hymn started playing that I wasn’t very familiar with. A big smile spread across my face, and a few tears of joy came to my eyes, because the words were so true for me. The first verse says,
My life flows on in endless song
Above earth’s lamentation;
I hear the sweet though far-off hymn
That hails a new creation.
Through all the tumult and the strife
I hear the music ringing;
It finds an echo in my soul.
How can I keep from singing?
(Pauline T., No. 533, adapt. © CSBD)
I have always loved praying with hymns because singing is such a natural way for me to feel the presence of Soul, God, and express the qualities of Soul. Hearing these words of truth set to music made the message feel even more powerful and brought me so much comfort.
I knew I couldn’t ever stop expressing joy because joy is a quality of God that’s always part of me. I immediately felt peaceful and calm.
The line, “How can I keep from singing?” really spoke to me because it felt so applicable to what I was dealing with. I understood it to be saying, “How can I stop expressing God’s joy?” I knew that I couldn’t because joy is a quality of God that’s always part of me. I immediately felt peaceful and calm.
Soon, I felt like myself again, and I went back to rehearsals knowing I could hold on to the thoughts “How can I keep from singing?” and “How can I stop expressing God’s joy?”
The rest of the week was full of joy, laughter, and singing!