Turning Points in Spiritual Growth September 9, 2019 Issue

Lifted out of despair

Valerie Russell

When my husband and I were expecting our first child, I began a search for the peace and comfort that had characterized my own childhood. I had been raised in a Christian Science home and had experienced many healings, both with my mother’s support and through my own prayers. I attended a Christian Science Sunday School regularly throughout my youth until I left for college. Then I began to stray from the teachings of Christian Science and question its value in my life. But I remember missing feeling close to God during this time as I wandered spiritually for several years.

After the birth of our son, I followed a regular schedule of pediatrician visits. The pediatrician was loving but firm about a timetable of standard medical recommendations. I began to feel a deep and personal responsibility for my son and no longer felt confident in my ability to make the right decisions for his future care. I wanted to feel again the deep trust in God that had so often brought healing and peace to my childhood. I suddenly could not think clearly about anything and became deeply depressed.

One day, in a desperate search for clarity, I opened The Christian Science Journal to the Directory and randomly picked a Christian Science practitioner to call. She answered immediately, and I flooded her with my fears and anxiety. But the spiritual ideas she shared with me began to gently lead me back to more familiar and spiritual views of God’s tender care for His children. Familiar Bible passages began to fill my thought, such as “Trust in the Lord with all thine heart; and lean not unto thine own understanding. In all thy ways acknowledge him, and he shall direct thy paths” (Proverbs 3:5, 6).

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