The joy that is mine
In late 2008, I was invited to stay at my friends’ high-rise condo overlooking San Diego Bay while they would be away for three months. Loving San Diego, and being able to do my work as a Christian Science practitioner from anywhere in the world, made the decision easy for me. So I packed up the car, took the pup, and off we went from Missouri, where I was living at the time, to California.
The stay at my friends’ condo was great. Everything was going perfectly. Then with about three weeks of my stay left, my shoulder began to hurt. I prayed knowing my oneness with God, as I had learned to do in Christian Science. I understood that no discordant condition could attach itself to me, as God’s spiritual reflection. However, by evening the pain was quite severe. I couldn’t lie down, I couldn’t stand, and walking the dog was done in tears. By the next morning, despite my heartfelt reaching out to God for help, fear had set in, and I decided to call a Christian Science practitioner for prayerful treatment.
The practitioner and I spoke at least twice a day for almost three weeks. I was striving to express more grace and humility. I prayed to realize more of God’s allness, His oneness, His presence. Everything I read in the Bible and the Christian Science literature seemed to be leading me to getting a deeper understanding of God’s allness. In her book Science and Health with Key to the Scriptures, Mary Baker Eddy gives us her spiritual sense of the Lord’s Prayer. I especially remember prayerfully working with the last line: “For God is infinite, all-power, all Life, Truth, Love, over all, and All” (p. 17 ). I made several little sentences out of this and pondered each of them individually: God is. God is infinite. God is all-power. God is all Life. God is all Truth. God is all Love. God is over all. God is all. That left no possibility that I could be outside of God. God, being all, meant that there was no inside or outside to God. Just all.
I gained deep, profound, inspiration and insights. However, even with all the prayerful work the practitioner and I were doing, it didn’t seem to be having any effect on the physical condition. Then, in the third week, I heard the message—joy! Perhaps this is what God was telling me all along and it just took me that long to get it. Joy! The kind of joy that comes from a steadfast conviction, certainty of God being all and of my oneness with Him, the absolute knowledge and understanding that the truths we were praying were, for a fact, the truth. As my joy developed, a Christmas hymn came to thought—“O Holy Night.” “That’s it,” I realized. “There is holiness and wholeness in the night. That’s the joy that is mine, even in the midst of pain.”
At that point, I knew in my heart that the healing was complete, even though the outward condition had not changed. I wasn’t afraid anymore. The fear had vanished. The next day, the pain lessened considerably, and by the following day the shoulder only hurt when I tried to use my arm. I was grateful to be able to take a shower for the first time in almost three weeks and walking the pup became a pleasure again.
However, there was more prayerful work to be done. I realized that there was some lingering thought that just maybe God wasn’t quite all, that just maybe a little part of me—His image—lived outside of Him in matter. “All is all,” I reasoned. With that, I got another message, “You can’t use your arm because you’re not using it.” In other words, I couldn’t experience my freedom because I wasn’t exercising my dominion. So I started using my arm/shoulder more and more. Each time, I would not ask myself about my shoulder’s condition. Rather, I’d ask God. And God’s answer was reassuring me. So, with confidence and joy, I proceeded with normal activities.
The next day, a friend from Missouri, who had planned to drive back with me, arrived. (We love road trips!) There was packing to do and the car needed to be loaded. It was all done with prayer, gratitude, joy, and freedom.
Further proof of this healing was evident a week or so after I got home. I was in the garage using a sander. Even with the vibration of the sander, and the motion and pressure I had to place on my arm, there was complete freedom. The healing has remained permanent.
My gratitude goes to that steadfast, loving practitioner for always being there and always being inspired, and to God for being what He is—All!
Vienna McMurtry
La Mesa, California, US
