PARENTING April 19, 2004 Issue

The language we teach our children

Jonatha Wey

NO, I DON'T MEAN French, Italian, or Spanish. Have you ever heard someone say, "He doesn't speak the language" —meaning, he or she doesn't get it? The it could be anything ranging from patience, to discipline, to honesty.

Sometimes children don't understand what parents are trying to teach them. Sometimes they do and just pretend not to. How, then, are parents supposed to follow the Bible admonition to "train up a child in the way he should go" (Prov. 22:6)? As a mother of three, I know how overwhelming it can be—so much to do, such a feeling of responsibility.

I've found over the years that the best thing I can do is start each day by going to God. Prayer strengthens my understanding of how good God is. The idea that I am made to express His goodness literally feeds my actions throughout the day. Then I have the wisdom, patience and love to deal with my children—and with myself, too. An article by Mary Baker Eddy titled "The Way" describes the three mental stages of spiritual growth as 1) self-knowledge, 2) humility, and 3) love (see Miscellaneous Writings 1883-1896, pp. 355-359). Noting this progression in my own thought has toned and fine-tuned my mothering activity.