Article July 28, 2003 Issue

No one has to simply endure chronic illness

By J. Thomas Black

THERE WAS SOME INNER RESOLVE, some core of dignity and strength in her. When this woman and others climbed onto the subway train and stood near me, I smiled and nodded at them modestly. The blond young woman with the Lord & Taylor bag standing next to her smiled briefly in reply. But not this woman. She slowly turned away her almost expressionless face—not, I felt, out of any suspicion or self-defense as a woman but out of some inner poise, for her eyes danced a moment and she seemed pleasant, relaxed. She was an Indian woman, black hair with a few white strands pulled into a bun, strong, high cheeks, dark and shining eyes.

As we all swayed together toward the next stop, I noticed she wore sandals that revealed, almost displayed, a slightly deformed toe. But she was not intimidated.

Have you noticed that most of us who endure chronic illnesses or conditions do our best to conceal them? Maybe we think they're outward signs of some inner flaw we prefer that others not know about. But this woman made no apology for the blemish and apparently felt no embarrassment about it, and this caused me to admire her.