WHAT "THE RIGHT ONE" WAS THINKING

I'd had several serious relationships, but the majority of them were very unhappy. After a three-year relationship that left me feeling emotionally battered, I decided to pray. I don't mean that I got down on my knees and closed my eyes. Prayer is such a living, dynamic thing—it can take many forms. I used three different kinds of prayer to find help in this situation:

Loving myself. I had grown up with the Bible and knew well Jesus' saying, "Thou shalt love thy neighbor as thyself." Now, how can you love your neighbor as yourself, if you don't love yourself in the first place? Because I knew I was the child of a loving God, I decided that I deserved to have companionship that made me feel good about myself. If I really loved myself, I wouldn't settle for anything less. This got rid of the classic way of starting relationships: "Oh, he's cute. I think I'll get involved and then find out if I like him." Instead, I started to think about what qualities the men I met expressed.

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The seed that always bears fruit
June 11, 2001
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