Article August 8, 1994 Issue

Are we worthy to be the children of God?

Jean McCrae Sanborn

When I was a very small child, in the early 1900s, my parents did a socially unacceptable thing—they divorced. I remained with my mother, and by the time I was in the eighth grade in school there was not enough income to continue my education. I had to go to work. The feeling of guilt and shame about coming from a broken home and about the poverty and lack of education gave me a sense of unworthiness. Since these conditions were not of my own making, I felt bitter and unhappy. III much of the time, and not feeling loved or cared for, I decided I didn't want to live. Consuming alcohol seemed to ease the pain, temporarily at least. Under these depressing circumstances there were several attempts at suicide, and I became an alcoholic by the time I was in my late teens.

Then came the glorious and joyful day when Christian Science was introduced into my life. A woman who had known my family years before loaned me a copy of Science and Health by Mrs. Eddy. As I read the pages of this wonderfully enlightening book, I learned and accepted the fact that I was God's loved child, not a slave to alcohol. I learned also that God is my Father-Mother and that as divine Love He mercifully meets all human needs. With this wonderful sense of being loved and cared for without condemnation, I was healed of alcoholism and freed from the feeling of shame and unworthiness. The tendency to blame others for my unfortunate circumstances left me completely, and I was able to forgive. This forgiveness, this love for others, healed the hurt and bitterness. The Word of God had changed my life.

In learning that God is the only Life, and therefore the source of my life, I lost the desire to die and also the fear of death. I never again attempted suicide. I learned to love this wonderful, complete, and abundant concept of Life, and I have continued to do so, finding much happiness through a growing spiritual understanding.

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