Giving eliminates loneliness
This testimony was originally recorded as a Sentinel podcast, and published on the Web on May 22, 2012. It has been adapted for print.
After moving away from my family during college, I had to overcome a great sense of loneliness. As a Christian Scientist, I turned to prayer, and what kept coming to me was “God setteth the solitary in families” (Psalms 68:6 ).
Since this repeated itself in my thought, I took it to be an angel message, and it comforted me to know God was there. Then a good friend moved away, and that really added to the sense of loneliness. That’s when I “hit the books,” so to speak—the Bible and Science and Health with Key to the Scriptures, by Mary Baker Eddy.
I had learned that these two books are our pastor, and that I should go to our pastor if I ever had a challenge.
In Science and Health, Mrs. Eddy says: “Would existence without personal friends be to you a blank? Then the time will come when you will be solitary, left without sympathy; but this seeming vacuum is already filled with divine Love. When this hour of development comes, even if you cling to a sense of personal joys, spiritual Love will force you to accept what best promotes your growth” (p. 266 ). From this, I realized I needed to strengthen my understanding of my relationship with God.
During this time, as I listened to Sentinel radio programs and read articles about Christian Science, I realized the power of gratitude in healing. I started keeping a journal of all the things that I was grateful for, along with blessings, and healings. As I did that, my thoughts opened up to the good that surrounds us, always, and how much I have to be grateful for.
Science and Health says: “Are we really grateful for the good already received? Then we shall avail ourselves of the blessings we have, and thus be fitted to receive more. Gratitude is much more than a verbal expression of thanks. Action expresses more gratitude than speech” (p. 3 ).
I found this to be true. I went from thinking, “What can I get from things like work, finding a job, and so forth” to “What can I give, what skills, or gifts, do I have that I can share with others?” That change in thought opened up fulfilling employment, and gradually I began to get a deeper trust in God’s care for me.
I also started thinking, “What can I give to church?” I found as I offered my help with different things, opportunities opened up. I became an usher and helped out in the Christian Science Reading Room more, and then I became a member of the church’s executive board, and it was, again, a big blessing. I continued with the motive of giving, instead of so much focus on receiving. I realized that receiving comes naturally if you give. The loneliness I’d been struggling with since I’d left home dissipated as I learned to trust God.
Friendships blossomed in unexpected ways, and that also opened up new possibilities and new thoughts. I wasn’t so fixed on holding on to my old ideals or dreams or opinions.
As I trust God, I find that my own plans and outlines aren’t always as great as I thought they were; His ideas are much bigger and better than mine. Christian Science has shown me that what’s true for one is true for all. If I can overcome loneliness, and find my oneness with the Father, anyone reading this testimony can. Every moment, I can look around me and be grateful for the good God has given me, and feel truly blessed.
Kayla E. McCulley-Stevens
Princeton, New Jersey, US
