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Healing victories and freedom from the past
For many years, I felt like Job in the Bible. It looked as if I had lost everything—my fortune, contact with my children, all that I most loved—just as he had. But when Job finally stood for his perfection and his love for God, and saw that his suffering never came from God, all that he had lost was returned even greater than before. I, too, learned a purer sense of identity and freedom as a spiritual idea of God, without mortal birth, having no mortal history.
I suffered the pains of child abuse and eventually sexual abuse at a very young age. The shame and guilt from these experiences affected my life, both as a child and as an adult. I always had a sense of unworthiness. I felt I didn’t deserve to have a happy, loving relationship, and I made mistakes in three marriages. I felt I could make up for my guilt by changing my marriage partners’ behavior.
But even though I thought of myself as a strong person, I always felt very submissive toward each of my husbands and unsure of myself. I never really trusted them, and through the years I have come to realize that I was actually afraid of them. Yet I stayed in those unhappy marriages in order to protect my four children and to make sure they had a home.
Enjoy 1 free Sentinel article or audio program each month, including content from 1898 to today.
July 4, 2011 issue
View Issue-
Letters
Ellie Braman, Sandra C. McNeill, Terry Holliday, Faith Donavin, Richard Arlen
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Fireworks!
Ingrid Peschke, Managing Editor
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Churches seek out innovative solutions
Cathy Lynn Grossman
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Earthquakes—and praying about ‘the big one’
Robert Storm
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A humbling experience
Kathleen Collins
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To witness God's care
Elizabeth Mata
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Spiritual balance restored
By Don Snyder
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Our infinite value
By Michele Newport
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Admission of new members
Nathan Talbot
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Peace in the Middle East: What your prayers can do
By Rosalie E. Dunbar, News Editor
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Healing — our ‘Declaration of Independence’
By Susan Fleming
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Never separated from God
By Marie-Luise Bolay
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Freedom and healing with the Lord’s Prayer
By Suzanne Connolly
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Healing victories and freedom from the past
Name withheld
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At the pool of . . .
Rob Swales
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Prayer about pain
Caryl Farkas
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I love God
Ava
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God is special
James
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Your questions about Church
Tad Blake-Weber, Manya Kaseroff-Smith
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Free from chronic knee trouble
Lisa Sorrentino
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A more spiritualized vision
Mirta Piccoli
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An injury is quickly healed
Ann Bennett
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To defeat dementia
The Editors