I enjoyed growing up in a family where religious freedom was the daily norm. Religious conviction was considered to be a matter of individual conscience. It was recognized that each person has a right to grow into his or her own understanding concerning religious beliefs and to be true to them in practice. People of all faiths were respected for living in accord with their convictions—whether or not we happened to share their beliefs. It was a fine illustration of the Golden Rule given to humanity by Christ Jesus: "All things whatsoever ye would that men should do to you, do ye even so to them" (Matt. 7:12). Consequently, though my siblings and I received religious training in the local Episcopal church (where I was active right through high school), we felt free to pursue (or not to pursue) our own religious exploration.

My husband, soon after we began dating, laid the groundwork for the same kind of religious freedom to flourish in our own relationship and family life. He did it through his practice of the Golden Rule—establishing mutual respect between us in regard to individual religious convictions. After telling me he would like me to wear his fraternity pin (as a commitment to date only one another), he said: "Before you give me your answer, I need to tell you something. I am a Christian Scientist, and I expect to be one for the rest of my life. I don't know right now if our relationship will lead us to consider marriage, but I want you to know that when I do marry, I will expect my wife to let me lead the life of a Christian Scientist."

What he did not know (because up to that point we had not discussed religion) was that for the past year I had been studying the Christian Science textbook, Science and Health with Key to the Scriptures by Mary Baker Eddy, and was finding its teachings satisfying and practical. But this study was still a strictly private spiritual pursuit—between me and God. I had many unanswered questions and more exploring to do, so was nowhere near ready to make a commitment to Christian Science. I needed room to grow into my own convictions, and this young man was giving it to me. If he had said "I'll expect my wife to be a Christian Scientist," I'm sure it would have been the end of our relationship. Instead, it was a solid beginning.

Our marriage has been full of mutual respect and individual spiritual growth. I continued my independent study of Christian Science, and gradually found it answering my questions so satisfactorily that I chose it as my way of life. My husband and I have each continued to grow at our own pace through the years in our individual convictions and in our practice of Christian Science—according to our own unfolding understanding. This has given us a sound basis from which to work out harmoniously, through mutual compromise whenever necessary, all the questions that come up in marriage and family life. We are happy to see our grown children supporting and practicing religious freedom within their own families.

Why do people need room to grow spiritually according to their own conscience? Isn't it because conscience is a divine right? Mrs. Eddy says: "God has endowed man with inalienable rights, among which are self-government, reason, and conscience. Man is properly self-governed only when he is guided rightly and governed by his Maker, divine Truth and Love" (Science and Health, p. 106).

That's one of the things students of Christian Science cherish most about its teachings—that God, all-powerful good, alone has authority to govern man. To let God's government reign in your thought, and to experience the freedom, regeneration, and healing that come with spiritual self-government, is to want this autonomy for everyone. That means that we are willing to let people have the freedom to experience God's government by their own choice without interference—to seek God's guidance, and to exercise spiritual self-government, in their own lives.

The stronger our own religious convictions, the more essential it is to let others know we respect their need to follow their own conscience. The more we let divine Love govern our own thoughts and actions, and the less we judge, criticize, or try to control other lives, the more we will be promoting the spiritual progress of others. And the more respect we will be shown by them for practicing what we believe in.

In this way, religious freedom promotes harmony within families—and within communities. It allows God's government of man to become more concretely apparent. As Mrs. Eddy says, "Mankind will be God-governed in proportion as God's government becomes apparent, the Golden Rule utilized, and the rights of man and the liberty of conscience held sacred" (The First Church of Christ, Scientist, and Miscellany, p. 222).

It's not always easy to let loved ones find their own way spiritually—especially when you feel strongly that what you believe in can be of great benefit to them, saving them much heartache and pain. I've been helped by something my mother said to me when my children were young. I had grown strong in my love for and commitment to Christian Science, and our family was richly experiencing its many moral and physical blessings. It was our way of life. I told my mom how grateful I was to her and Dad for providing a family environment that enabled me to find my own religion and to practice it within the embrace of their respect and love, even though they didn't fully understand or share my choice. She gently advised, "Be sure you give the same gift to your own children." I think they would say that we have.

Today, the genuine goodness, love, respect, harmony, and enjoyment of one another's company that exist throughout our family and the entirety of our combined extended families are notable, especially in view of the diversity of religious affiliation (including Lutheran, Methodist, Episcopalian, Unitarian, Christian Science, Presbyterian, Congregational, Jewish, and Buddhist) as well as nonaffiliation.

Truly, when impelled by genuine Christly love, religious freedom within the family allows God's government to become more evident in family life.

Barbara M. Vining