Mrs. Eddy says in Science and Health (p. 66), "Trials are...

Mrs. Eddy says in Science and Health (p. 66), "Trials are proofs of God's care." I had the opportunity to experience the truth of that statement. I had had an unpleasant experience with a member of our firm, and became resentful in reaction to what I felt were unfair accusations. I realized that this negative thinking was certainly unscientific, yet I persisted in being resentful and critical of this person. Within a week after the incident I noticed that I was having difficulty with my left shoulder and arm and had to have help in putting on my coat. The problem persisted, and although I tried to apply the teachings of Christian Science, the difficulty remained. During the Christmas holidays I asked a Christian Science practitioner for treatment and earnestly sought to apply the simple truths of this Science. In my study, one passage from Science and Health was of particular help to me (p. 242): "In patient obedience to a patient God, let us labor to dissolve with the universal solvent of Love the adamant of error,—self-will, self-justification, and self-love,—which wars against spirituality and is the law of sin and death."

It seemed to me that through this study I was gaining a clearer idea that I and my fellowman were children of God. But one morning I awoke in much pain, and apparently unable to use my arm. The pain seemed so real that there was little else I could do for relief except sing hymns from the Christian Science Hymnal. I found that I was unable to lie down at night but had to sleep in a sitting position in an armchair with my arm elevated, and even then sleep was for short periods. I was passing through deep waters and began to have doubts whether I was equal to meeting the problem in Christian Science. Faithful help was given by the practitioner, and although I continued in these circumstances for several days, I studied and declared the truths of Christian Science as best I could.

The practitioner reminded me of the story of Elijah, when, after he had slain the false prophets of Baal, he went into the wilderness, despairing of his own life because he was the one remaining prophet of God whom Jezebel sought to kill. Yet his thought was spiritually revitalized by the angel messages which came to him showing that his God was not in the earthquake, wind, or fire but in the still small voice of Truth speaking to his consciousness and meeting his human need. The significance of that story to me was that Elijah, even when his world seemed to be breaking up around him, was able to stand and claim his God-given dominion and thus gain the victory. Hymn No. 74 from the Hymnal, illustrating this story, was of special significance to me:

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July 4, 1970
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