Article March 13, 2017 Issue

What do you see in the mirror?

Ella Gates

Close your eyes for a minute. Imagine yourself looking in a mirror. What do you see? For a long time, when I looked in the mirror, all I saw were the flaws. I would fixate on the blemishes and the imperfections, the small things that I couldn’t stand about my image. But my problem wasn’t only with my physical appearance. I was constantly worrying about not meeting expectations, and I felt a crushing amount of self-doubt and negativity. I would lie awake at night wondering if I would ever achieve anything—if I would meet any of my goals.

Sometimes I missed school because I was emotionally and physically exhausted. I struggled with the idea of God being Love, because while I thought that I loved others, I felt I was unable to love myself. I stubbornly refused to turn to Christian Science because of the nature of the problem; I felt it was up to me to change my thought and become more positive.

Something shifted, though, when I realized how many healings I’d had that came about due to my study of Christian Science. At that point, I did turn to the ideas in the Bible and Science and Health with Key to the Scriptures, by Mary Baker Eddy, for help, and I’m so grateful I made that decision, because it changed everything.

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