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Rescued from dark thoughts
WHEN I WAS 14, I LAPSED INTO A DEPRESSION that went on for a number of months. During that time, I often had thoughts of suicide. I'd been dealing with mood swings, anger, sleepless nights, and fights with my family. It seemed like there had been a growing gap between God and myself. But these difficult months felt even more severe. I was beginning to physically harm myself. I'd even cut myself on purpose a few times.
My parents were supportive throughout this time, talking to me, praying about my well-being, and even suggesting I talk to a Christian Science practitioner. But I also kept a lot of what I was feeling to myself. I wouldn't agree to seek help, even though my parents persisted in encouraging me, because I felt vulnerable. I would go in and out of stages, sometimes believing myself cured, sometimes actually enjoying depression. Against parent's rules, I would leave the house to go on walks late at night, hoping to get hurt.
It was around this time that I had a bad argument with a family member, and, through tears, the thought of suicide came so strongly that it shocked me. I began wondering how I'd allowed my thought to plummet so far. As someone who was raised in Christian Science, I always felt like I had a good understanding of it, but I realized I needed to take another, much deeper look.
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with contributions from LINNY BEE, JODIE KENNEDY, VICKI KNICKERBOCKER, MILDRED S. LARUAN, ADOLF WALTER KNOPFEL, ROBERT STRANATHAN
A GPS FOR LIFE
MAIKE BYRD, STAFF EDITOR
ITEMS OF INTEREST
with contributions from Mollie Ziegler Hemingway, Oswald Pereira, Tom Krattenmaker
CASTING OUT CORRUPTION IN GOVERNMENT
THE ULTIMATE SHEPHERD
Prayer that puts a stop to crimes against children
BY TONY LOBL
BY DILSHAD KHAMBATTA EAMES
DIVINE JUSTICE AT WORK
BY HELEN SMART
Every step with God's leading
BY MARTHA MOFFETT
5 lessons from the dance floor
BY JENNIFER DOAK
A nation reflects on God
BY RUSS GERBER
Church membership increases our strength
BY JUDY HEDRICK
HEALINGS LEAD TO A LIFE OF SPIRITUAL SERVICE
HEALED OF RECURRING PAIN
QUICKLY HEALED AFTER A FALL AND A SUDDEN ILLNESS
NO SURGERY NEEDED
CARMEM TEREZA FONSECA MEDEIROS with contributions from LEONARDO