Article April 13, 1998 Issue

Single, and loving it

Living alone needn't be a lonely life.

By Lorita B. Williams

In my mid-twenties, I fell in love with a man who was wonderful except for one bad habit: he indulged in recreational drugs. It wasn't something he did every day, just once in a while, and everything else about him was terrific. I tried everything I could to get him to stop, and when that didn't work I ignored the problem.

We dated seriously for over three years, but when the subject of marriage came up I knew I had some deep soul-searching to do. Could I really commit myself to someone who was practicing a lifestyle so opposed to mine? I knew that marriage was a lifelong commitment, and I needed to be honest with myself and with God in terms of what I could live with, and what would best promote my spiritual development.

In Science and Health Mary Baker Eddy states, "Kindred tastes, motives, and aspirations are necessary to the formation of a happy and permanent companionship" (p. 60). Many of our friends were getting married, and the pressure from them to stay with him was intense. In order to hear God more clearly and make the right decision, I asked a Christian Science practitioner to pray with me. I also took a week off from work and turned to God in deep consecrated prayer for direction and guidance. At the end of the week I had my answer and the courage to end the relationship.

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