Editorial August 12, 1991 Issue

Invite the most important wedding guest

Allison W. Phinney, Jr.

Marrying is something human beings do. Like many other things people do, it is sometimes done well, but all too often not so well.

Getting married because of sexual attraction, for example, or the way someone looks physically or something about his or her personality that seems appealing, just doesn't work out very well. It obviously isn't a basis for real love, nor is it enough to make people want to stay together. And breaking apart, especially when there are children, isn't happy or anything anyone is proud of later on. A family isn't something that is nice to enjoy once in a while and which can be broken up if necessary. The very nature of a family is that it is meant to last.

One thing that probably needs saying straight out in discussing the subject is that marriages are not "made in heaven," and though marital bliss can be helped by words said at the altar, it is not guaranteed by them. A marriage is the outcome of what two people do. It is the result of what those two people think each day, what they love, and how much they love. It has as much of the divine in it—or as little—as those two are living and realizing.

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