My life today bears little resemblance to what it was six years ago...

My life today bears little resemblance to what it was six years ago when I seriously resumed my study of Christian Science. Although I had been raised in Science, I strayed from its teachings during college and early adulthood. I thought that by living in conformity with the moral and spiritual demands of this Science, I would be missing out on life. That reasoning has proved to be false, for through my renewed study I have gained the true, spiritual sense of life, and much more.

A short while after I had returned to the study of Christian Science, my husband and I desired to start a family. Soon I thought I was pregnant, but there were problems from the start. I got in touch with a Christian Science practitioner, who agreed to pray for me. I also retained a doctor for the delivery in order to comply with state law. Three months passed, and one day I began hemorrhaging. Although the doctor's tests had confirmed and now reconfirmed a pregnancy, the condition persisted until I apparently had a miscarriage.

The doctor was called because of the miscarriage. He informed me that I had not been pregnant but had had a tumor, and he said that pathologists would be examining the growth to determine whether or not it was malignant. As the doctor was telling me all this, a small voice within me prayed, "God, give me strength," because I felt that only through radical reliance on God would I be healed of the physical and psychological effects of this experience.

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February 6, 1984

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