Article February 10, 2003 Issue

Real love—what is it and where do we find it?

BY Cynthia Neely

EVERYONE WANTS TO FEEL IMPORTANT and valuable, especially to that "special someone." And for many people, Valentine's Day is the day when they count on someone making them feel loved. But why limit feeling loved to one holiday? You can feel unconditional love every day when you discover that the love you are looking for does not, in fact, come primarily from a person. Real love, permanent love, comes from the source of all love—God.

But understanding this fact, and accepting a more spiritual expression of love than only that which comes in human relationships, doesn't mean having to give up the traditions of flowers, candy, and a wonderful romantic night. This is so because God never witholds any good from any of us. He always showers His/Her goodness on us in an infinite number of tangible, practical ways.

Nevertheless, it's not uncommon to try to find a person to make us feel loved instead of experiencing love by just being kind and loving to everyone ourselves. And this pursuit of finding a perfect mate might even work—we could find that special someone and feel very loved and secure. Yet that person and the love they've offered could at any time make an exit, leaving us once again feeling empty and unfulfilled. Then, without that human love making us feel valued, come feelings of hopelessness and despair.