Letters January 20, 2003 Issue

letters

with contributions from Annette Plikerd, Susan J. Ehart

I feel compelled to write to you to thank you for the December 16 issue of the Sentinel, "Standing up to abusive behavior."

I grew up witnessing my parents' arguments in which my dad routinely beat up my mother. It was scary and incomprehensible to me as a child. On the outside, our family appeared to be rather affluent, well groomed, and polite. We looked like regular, middle-class Americans living in the suburbs. To maintain this facade, my mother insisted I never tell anyone about their fights, and I never did.

Then I married a man who was violent, who yelled and hit me, too, and I saw the power of intimidation and control, disguised as love, at work in my own life. I was a successful business executive, yet in my marriage I felt helpless to stop the violence. Eventually, I found the courage to leave and started rebuilding my life—through the help of Christian Science. I forgave my mother for staying with my dad, because I better understood what she was experiencing.

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