Testimony of Healing October 15, 1904 Issue

I was a sufferer for years from nervous prostration

M. I. W.

I was a sufferer for years from nervous prostration. I will not attempt a description of my sufferings, for they can never be known or understood, except by those who have had a like experience. I will only say that the physical suffering, which was great, was nothing compared with the mental. Christian Science was presented to me several years ago, but I was not then ready for it, I held strongly to the old thought and felt it would be very wrong to turn away from what I believed to be the truth, even if it would heal me, which I doubted. I felt that I would rather die than be healed by something which I thought required me to give up the atonement. I dared not let go of it while believing that my future salvation depended upon it. I now know that both my present and future salvation depend upon it.

I did not die, but suffered on, and finally got into such a mental condition that I could not trust, reason, or pray. I shudder now to recall the agony of those months and years. I found I did not, and could not, love a God who, I believed, had power, but who, in spite of all my cries to Him, would not send me relief. Thus I drifted for a time, when one day in passing the office of a Christian Scientist it occurred to me to go in, but I passed by, then stopped, hesitated, turned back, and in my desperation went in, I hardly knew why, as I did not think I should take treatments. The practitioner received me kindly, and before I left it was arranged that I should take treatments. These were continued for about nine months. My recovery was slow, but I never wanted to give up or let go, though I had many dark hours of doubt, discouragement, and fear.

I want to say to those whose recovery seems slow, Do not be discouraged, the time will come when you will feel as I do now, that not one hour of that time was lost, for my experience would not now be what it is, if that time had been shortened by one day. I needed it all, and again I say do not be discouraged.

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