In our daily contacts with people, we may make judgments of them. But what if instead we are loving enough to see through human labels and imperfections and prayerfully stand up for others’ true, spiritual, God-given goodness? In other words, will we be someone who “throws shade” or someone who takes to heart the fact that we reflect the light of divine Love?

“Throwing shade” is a colloquial term describing a negative attitude that criticizes others. For example: “Why can’t that mother figure out how to discipline her child?” “That guy in the checkout looks snobby.” If communicated, even subtly, the effect of all this shade can feel like someone deliberately blocking the sun from you on a pleasant day so you are left chilly instead of enjoying some warmth. 

The Bible says, “God is light, and in him is no darkness at all” (I John 1:5), and, “God is love” (4:8), so it follows that when we show love to others, we, as God’s reflection, are expressing the light of God’s love. 

We have lots of opportunities each day to decide if we’re going to resist “throwing shade.” But this may feel challenging if we live in a fast-moving culture where a “what works for me,” hypercritical attitude often seems to predominate. It may take sustained diligence to cultivate a patient and sincere appreciation for others. Is it worth it?  

Christ Jesus, the master Christian, certainly thought that expressing a loving, nonjudgmental attitude mattered. He didn’t say that we can’t make benign observations—ones that lead to thoughtful prayer. But he did clearly say in his Sermon on the Mount: “Judge not, that ye be not judged. For with what judgment ye judge, ye shall be judged: and with what measure ye mete, it shall be measured to you again” (Matthew 7:1, 2). 

God gently revealed to me that a critical attitude was darkening my life.

Like many of the best-known teachings of Jesus, “Judge not” is an emphatic statement. It communicates that we should refrain from judging others not only because, implicitly, it is the moral thing to do, but because there can be consequences for us. In other words, if we “throw shade,” we might find ourselves “in the shade.” Or as The Message Bible translation says in its direct way: “Don’t pick on people, jump on their failures, criticize their faults—unless, of course, you want the same treatment. That critical spirit has a way of boomeranging. It’s easy to see a smudge on your neighbor’s face and be oblivious to the ugly sneer on your own” (Matthew 7:1–3, Eugene H. Peterson). If we needed an incentive to refrain from destructive criticism, that certainly is one! 

I had an opportunity to learn this as a young adult. As I studied Christian Science, God, divine Mind, gently revealed to me that a critical attitude was darkening and limiting my life. I began to see that what was needed in my attitude toward others—and myself—was not a petty mental accounting of every flaw in appearance or behavior, but a willingness to see more of the perfect man of God’s creating. As this shift in perspective took place, I felt more relaxed and happy. My God-given sunny disposition began to shine through the fog of the former habit of negative criticism I had indulged.

Perhaps this kind of mental shift sounds a bit easier said than done. How can we demonstrate the inner strength and grace to consistently love others on those emotionally cloudy days when glowering might seem easier than glowing? Again, we look to Jesus’ example to learn more about what enables a light-filled attitude.

We look to Jesus’ example to learn more about what enables a light-filled attitude.

Mary Baker Eddy, the Discoverer and Founder of Christian Science, says in Science and Health with Key to the Scriptures, “The divine nature was best expressed in Christ Jesus, who threw upon mortals the truer reflection of God and lifted their lives higher than their poor thought-models would allow,—thoughts which presented man as fallen, sick, sinning, and dying” (p. 259).

Divine Love—which is infinite—is the source of the “divine nature” that Jesus expressed so completely. It is the source of our Godlike nature, too. As we begin to understand this, reflecting the light of Love feels natural rather than full of stressful effort. 

The value of recognizing the true, God-derived nature of others certainly applies as well to the attitude we hold toward ourselves. Sometimes individuals can be their own severest critic, and they may find that they are “throwing shade” at themselves, living with a negative, darkened frame of mind. But a change in this mental tendency is possible when we let spiritual understanding unmask the habit of self-criticism, and the realization dawns that such an unhealthy view is not God’s intention for us—or for anyone. 

In her Miscellaneous Writings 1883–1896, Eddy writes: “Let no clouds of sin gather and fall in mist and showers from thine own mental atmosphere. Hold thy gaze to the light, and the iris of faith, more beautiful than the rainbow seen from my window at the close of a balmy autumnal day, will span thy heavens of thought” (p. 355). 

Warmth, not coldness. Love, not disdain. That’s something we can offer to a world that needs less shade and more light.