Feeling at home, away from home
Originally appeared online in the teen series Your Healings - June 6, 2023
I’ve always felt a strong connection to my home. But until this past summer I hadn’t realized that I can feel a more expansive sense of home anywhere.
I’d been hired to be a counselor at a summer camp for Christian Scientists. I arrived at camp ecstatic to be there, but soon I was hit with an unexpected wave of homesickness. I started to feel uncomfortable because it seemed like the peace, comfort, and security that I associated with home weren’t there. The more I focused on these feelings, the worse I felt, until I realized that sadness had consumed my entire first week. I didn’t see how I could have a productive or happy camp experience this way. Something had to change, or it was going to be a long summer.
I knew that camp was a great place filled with good people and fun activities, but this reasoning could carry me only so far. To have a truly happy and memorable camp experience, I needed to change the way I was thinking. I realized I could pray. To me, prayer is listening to what God is telling me about myself—about the way He sees me. I realized that because God is Love, instead of trying to reason my way through this homesickness, I could trust Love to help me feel at home. I knew deep down that I didn’t have to be at home in order to feel at home. God could help me feel all the qualities of home at camp.
Something had to change, or it was going to be a long summer.
When I found a quiet place to pray, one of my favorite statements from Science and Health with Key to the Scriptures by Mary Baker Eddy came to me: “Divine Love always has met and always will meet every human need” (p. 494). To me, this was a promise that God was already providing me with what I thought I was missing. I knew I could pray with this idea by looking for ways that Love was meeting my needs right there at camp.
Another idea that came to me through my prayers was that I was at camp because God had a purpose for me there. By continuing to listen to God, I could recognize my purpose at camp even more fully. I felt so much better as I prayed with these ideas.
I decided that every day I would listen for inspiration from God that would help me to help others at camp. As I did, I began to recognize the qualities of home in myself and in others.
I found peace as I connected with old friends and a past conflict was resolved. I also saw peace in the beauty of my surroundings and the love expressed by the horses I was working with in the corral. I found comfort in the consistent and loving support of my supervisor, who knew I was struggling and offered inspiration of her own. I felt secure working through camper challenges because I was guided by God, and that blessed the campers, and me, and everyone else.
Within a few days, I realized that my physical home wasn’t the only place I could be happy and helpful. No matter where I was, I could find all the qualities of home because they are spiritual and come from God.
I’ve read the following explanation in Science and Health many times before, but this experience really showed me what it’s all about: “Prayer cannot change the Science of being, but it tends to bring us into harmony with it” (p. 2). My prayers didn’t actually change camp or my physical location, but they did help me to see and experience the harmony of home—everywhere.
