Over a number of years, I suffered with migraine headaches that sometimes made it necessary for me to spend a day at home in bed—and meant missing work, special occasions, and church. During this quiet time at home, I would pray to understand more about God and to feel more of His presence. I had been a Christian Scientist all my life, and as a result, I knew I had immediate recourse to the spiritual truth that had healed me on so many occasions. Each time I prayed about this challenge, I always felt encouraged and strengthened, and I was grateful when my prayers brought relief. But I longed to be free of the headaches altogether.

When I finally realized that I had really been focusing more on getting rid of the pain than on gaining a clearer view of my true identity as God's reflection and of my spiritual substance, I took a big leap forward on the road to complete healing. Now, I was not only becoming aware of some deep-rooted fears that had been controlling my mental horizon, but I was also learning to overcome them for good. For example, I began to turn over a fearful responsibility for my family's welfare to God. As well, my human will was being replaced with a more consistent, patient desire to do God's will, to entrust Him with our financial needs, the success of our business, the supply of right ideas to care for us all.

Though I had never tried to attribute the headaches to a material cause, I knew that my mother had suffered from migraines, and I didn't want to carry this predisposition on in thought to my children, anymore than I wanted to impose the false claims of heredity on myself. The study of Christian Science had taught me that heredity is a material theory, not a spiritual fact—it has no real power to influence health for good or for ill (see, for example, Science and Health, p. 228). I was determined to prove these truths both for myself, and because of my love for my fellow man, so that I would better understand how to help others who were struggling with difficult situations in their lives.

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October 31, 2005

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