Oh, no—Not another article telling me to forgive! That’s what I used to think whenever the subject of forgiveness came up in this magazine. Why is it so hard to forgive? Maybe because it can feel as though we are saying that what was done to us was OK. That can feel impossible to accept.

But forgiveness doesn’t mean condoning wrongdoing; it means no longer punishing ourselves for a wrong done against us. Holding a grudge is like trying to swim with an anchor tied to your legs. The hurt just keeps dragging you down. This is an example of animal magnetism, a term used in Christian Science to identify a suppositional force causing continual discord and discontent. It is actually invalid, for as God declares in the book of Isaiah, “I am the Lord, and there is none else, there is no God beside me” (45:5).

Our capacity to forgive is completely dependent on God’s grace.