Probably all of us at some time face situations we want to get out of. Maybe it's relatively minor—the promise you made to sew several costumes for the school play. Perhaps it involves something more serious, such as breaking up with a girlfriend or boyfriend, quitting a frustrating job, or struggling to figure out what to do about an unwanted pregnancy.

Whatever the situation, there is a path of healing. Prayer helps resolve any difficulty, large or small, and moves us forward, if we are willing to confront the problem rather than run from it. Several years ago, I found this out for myself, when the teachings of Christian Science showed me the way out of marriage difficulties.

Early in our marriage, my husband and I hit a stretch where differences in opinions, preferences, and perspectives increasingly challenged our sense of unity and compatibility. What we had once considered complementary characteristics in each other now seemed contrary and antagonistic. Small irritations and annoyances grew into tension and discord, and led us to wonder if we would ever be able to get back to feeling like a team again. Were we somehow fatally mismatched?

During a particularly low point, I began to feel permanently stuck in all the differences and disagreements. As I sat alone one day reviewing a recent exchange of words we'd had, the thought came to me that it might be better for both of us if we went our separate ways.

As a student of Christian Science, I'd learned to approach any discordant situation with prayer and an expectancy of healing. And I'd been praying about this situation, although answers had seemed out of reach. Now, following this new thought of resolution, I reached out to God and asked Him to show me the exit.

Almost immediately the words "a desire to die" came to mind. I recognized them as coming from Science and Health. I quickly found the passage where the phrase appears: "When it is learned that disease cannot destroy life, and that mortals are not saved from sin or sickness by death, this understanding will quicken into newness of life. It will master either a desire to die or a dread of the grave, and thus destroy the great fear that besets mortal existence" (p. 426).

I'd always thought of the phrase "a desire to die" as applying there to suicide. And I was startled to realize that it also applied to my current dead-end thinking! My desire to "get out" of a challenging and discordant situation was, in a sense, a death wish. Suddenly, it became very clear to me that even if I could secure an agreeable and graceful exit, I would be escaping not the discord, but the healing!

That giving up and leaving could be a positive solution, I realized, was a mental suggestion. It came from a limited, material sense of existence, which is the opposite of the spiritual or God-derived realities of life. This material view comes from a belief that life and intelligence are solely physical—that we're so many human minds with differing opinions, beliefs, and preferences, which at times are in agreement, but on other occasions may disagree, producing discord, conflict, frustration, anger, even hatred. This view is the opposite of the spiritual understanding of life as the manifestation of God, who is the Life of all things.

As spiritual beings, created in God's likeness, we include only the ongoing peace, unity, harmony, love, and progress that God authors. And because God is the one and only Mind, divine intelligence governs all creation. No other will, force, or perspective is actually present or has power. By entertaining the material view of existence, I was giving up on the real solution, namely, the healing and spiritual wholeness that God alone gives.

Suddenly I felt God's presence—that He was calling me to go forward, not as an escape artist but as a healer. I knew that divine Love never abandons or runs out on its idea, the man and woman that He created. And Love wasn't going to let me "die out" of this challenge.

At that moment, my commitment to healing took on new strength and energy. I realized that no matter how powerful or entrenched the differences and discord appeared to be in our relationship, they were not real, because they did not come from God and did not express the goodness and harmony of His creation. And I gained a new conviction that I could prove these facts to be true in my life.

Over the next several weeks, I prayed with these spiritual truths and actively related them to everyday interactions with my husband. I regularly affirmed that we were both children of God, united in and governed by His plan of complete good. When disagreements surfaced or differences loomed large, I didn't give up. My commitment to healing had been "quickened into newness of life" (see Science and Health, p. 426), and I saw that harmony was not only possible but inevitable. My husband, too, was praying about these challenges.

Gradually, steadily, genuine mutual consideration, joy, unity, and compatibility were restored in our relationship. I no longer felt we were mismatched. Instead of wanting to escape from an unhappy relationship, I wanted to enjoy the development of a healthy and progressive marriage.

Both of us agree that this healing has continued to support our marriage when new disagreements have arisen. We learned lessons that have proved helpful in other areas, including work, church, and family relationships.

If you're feeling stuck in discordant circumstances, or find yourself trying to figure how to get out of a difficult situation or commitment, a desire to die isn't in any sense the way out. Through prayer—by listening for God's healing messages—anyone can see the way forward, which divine Love has already opened up. It's a way of healing and regeneration that will bless all involved. And if the solution to a particular challenge is, in fact, a graceful exit, then the departure can happen naturally and harmoniously, through divine Love's guiding, rather than as a willful or discouraged reaction to people and events.

When the Philistine giant Goliath roared out his threatening challenge to the children of Israel, the Bible account says that David didn't run away. Instead, he "hasted, and ran ... to meet the Philistine" (I Sam. 17:48). Like David, we can decide not to run from challenges—even giant ones—but can confidently and triumphantly meet them through prayer and spiritual growth. CSS