Journey to finding God

A New Yorker finds Truth—on a park bench.

Although I was raised in a mainline Christian religion, I always wondered, "Where is God?" I got traditional answers, but I was never satisfied. I had attended the finest schools. After graduating from high school, I studied in Europe and later graduated from an Ivy League university, Neither my childhood religion nor my education had helped me find answers to my questions about life and the human experience, and by the time I was 20 I had become an atheist.

I had everything the world valued. I had a fine education, friends, popularity, good fortune, and I was engaged to a young man from an internationally known family. But I was unhappy—so unhappy that I decided to jump in front of a train, which was something people were doing frequently in New York in the late '70s. What was the point of life, I wondered? If I, who had experienced the best the world had to offer, was so miserable, and if there was no meaning to existence, why did people go on living?

'Church . . . is found'
June 3, 2002

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