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Jumping into Life's adventures
Terrified! That describes my feeling as the week came closer for me to jump out of a plane. But it wasn’t the parachute jump that had my stomach in knots; it was an upcoming move away from home to a new, strange environment to attend college—past the typical college age. The plane jump was a gift from a friend to distract me from the fear I had about the move. I accepted this wild invitation, figuring I could somehow wiggle out of the commitment before the date came around.
As the time approached, I decided I couldn’t justify my fear of the jump if I really understood that God is always with me, protecting me. As the Psalmist, whom Jesus quoted often, says: “Whither shall I go from thy spirit? or whither shall I flee from thy presence? If I ascend up into heaven, thou art there … ” (Psalms 139:7, 8 ).
I wasn’t anxious because I thought I would die; I was just afraid of the feeling of terror while standing at the door of a plane when getting ready to jump. Because I was certain of God’s constant protection, my fear of both jumps—from plane and from home—slowly yielded to a somewhat guarded enthusiasm and anticipation. I thought about Mary Baker Eddy’s comforting words, “Remember, thou canst be brought into no condition, be it ever so severe, where Love has not been before thee and where its tender lesson is not awaiting thee” (The First Church of Christ, Scientist, and Miscellany, pp. 149–150 ).
On the day of the jump, we zipped ourselves into our olive-green jumping suits. Then I was harnessed into a contraption that reminded me of a childhood swing my mom used to pull my legs into. Once I was strapped in and assembled in my jumping gear, I focused on my trainer’s instructions of how to position myself before, during, and after our tandem jump. His next words I have kept in my mind’s pocket ever since. He said, “Do not close your eyes in fear and miss the thrill and beauty of your first jump!” I realized that this was also true for the “first jump” I was to take when going away to college.
Finally, up the ramp we went. Twelve of us sat squished like sardines on the floor of the small plane, our legs wrapped around each other’s sides in order to fit. As the plane climbed to 3,500 feet, our excitement climbed with it.
Being elected to jump first, I stood with my trainer as he explained that he would count “1-2-3” right before we leaped from the plane. We moved toward the door, and as I was waiting for the promised count, he prematurely and intentionally pushed me out the door! (He wisely figured that I might grip the edges of the door in fear if he actually gave me the warning count.) Another guiding metaphor: Do not count the 1-2-3’s of going forward in life. Go forward without hesitation, eyes wide open to take in all the blessings of God’s love.
I don’t know if it was the sudden blast of wind or the surprise of floating above the earth that forced my mouth into a smile. Whatever it was, I felt I had just dropped into an aerial view of a Theibaud painting—a colorful patchwork of farmland interspersed with glistening streams. I felt weightless, entirely unattached to person, land, or fear. There was no falling sensation. I soared.
Like jumping from the plane, I would soon be leaving familiar ground to go off to college. Just as in the plane, where it didn’t matter whether I jumped from the left side or the right, so in life. I wouldn’t need to worry about going in a new direction as long as I listened for God’s guidance. Whatever the choice, I would always be in God’s care.
College turned out to be an amazing adventure as well. In both adventures—the jump and college—I felt I was living Mary Baker Eddy’s directive and its rewards: “Beholding the infinite tasks of truth, we pause,—wait on God. Then we push onward, until boundless thought walks enraptured, and conception unconfined is winged to reach the divine glory” (Science and Health with Key to the Scriptures, p. 323 ).
—Yvonne Renoult, San Francisco, California, US