The perfect job, the perfect house, the perfect marks in school. It can often seem like we’re in constant competition—sometimes with ourselves, oftentimes with others—to have or be the best.

There are many references in the Bible to perfection. Jesus implores us, “Be ye therefore perfect, even as your Father which is in heaven is perfect.”

Although the pursuit of perfection is perhaps one goal of a Christian, I’ve found there are Christly ways to achieve this goal as well as willful, perfectionist attempts. The Christly way heals and uplifts, while the way of perfectionism can be hurtful and debilitating. As a child I learned to approach perfection as a perfectionist and suffered as a result. But as I studied Christian Science, I gained a healing view of perfection that changed me for the better.

When I was growing up, I tried very hard to be perfect in everything I did and felt angry with myself when I fell short. Because I always expected myself to be absolutely humanly perfect and frequently wasn’t, I had low self-esteem. I didn’t feel like I measured up to my own high expectations.

Then, in college I learned about the perfection Christian Science teaches. I discovered that as God’s child I was already perfect. My job was to express the perfection that was inherent in my true spiritual nature. So I was working out from spiritual perfection instead of futilely trying to gain human perfection. Mary Baker Eddy, the Discoverer and Founder of Christian Science, wrote, “The Christlike understanding of scientific being and divine healing includes a perfect Principle and idea, —perfect God and perfect man, —as the basis of thought and demonstration.”

This new concept of my identity was in sharp contrast to how I’d been raised to think of myself. As a child, I felt I was an imperfect person prone to making mistakes who always needed to be chided and punished into expressing perfection. Yet, instead of being a lump of coal that required a great deal of pressure to be transformed into a diamond, Christian Science taught me that my true nature was spiritual. I was already a diamond!

Although I quickly embraced the Christian Science concept of my God-given perfection, it took a while for me to really understand and live this idea. An important turning point came during my first year as a classroom teacher. A reading consultant who came to observe my classroom noted that I was very critical of my third graders. I was shocked and mortified.

I’d been studying Christian Science for about eight years and thought I had a good handle on how to express love toward others. But as we spoke, she helped me see that by fastidiously focusing on correcting each of my students’ faults, I was being a perfectionist. Instead, she said I would benefit my students more by using “positive reinforcement”—looking for and praising the good they were doing, rather than focusing on their mistakes.

I recognized and accepted the wisdom and practicality of the reading consultant’s comments. And as I thought about what she said, I prayed to understand on a deeper spiritual level how to use this idea. I wasn’t satisfied with just changing outward behavior or manipulating students, I wanted to truly help them know who they were as God’s children.

It occurred to me that the deeper spiritual truth of “positive reinforcement” was gratitude—gratitude for all the good the students expressed. And as I focused on the good my students were accomplishing it would “magnify the Lord” as the Bible counsels us to do.

Although I’d been thinking about Christly love since college, I could see that I needed to demonstrate it more consistently in my classroom. I thought a lot about the nature of love, specifically Jesus’ example. Not only did he express his love through words, but his whole demeanor and thought was infused with love. He was able to see beyond the mistakes of mortals to each person’s true, perfect, spiritual nature. And this love healed them.

I realized that the impatient, arms-folded, foot-tapping quality of perfectionism is the antithesis of healing. I wanted to express a healing love by seeing each student’s true spiritual identity instead of willfully expecting them to live up to my human concept of perfection.

Instead of criticizing my students for not living up to my expectations for them, I made efforts to help them express true God-given perfection by simply seeing them the way God sees them. I began praising them for even the smallest expression of good, and I learned to be more of a cheerleader than a critic.

Although my transformation wasn’t instantaneous, I made steady progress as I prayed to love my students the way Jesus would have loved them. And as I became more loving and saw my students in a spiritual light, I noticed they responded by being more cooperative and productive.

One of the wonderful byproducts of this spiritual transformation is that as I’ve learned to love others more, I’ve also learned how to love myself and see my childhood experiences in a more spiritual light. I’m now patient and kind with myself and no longer beat myself up if I make a mistake. But most importantly, I’ve discovered that letting go of perfectionism isn’t letting go of perfection. It’s bringing God’s goodness to the forefront and letting that true sense of perfection guide us every step of the way.

God-given perfection:

Science and Health
259:11

King James Bible
Matt. 5:48
Ps. 34:3