Article September 3, 2012 Issue

Where should I be, God?

Jamey Kane

Jamey stands outside of The Christian Science Publishing Society.

CAROLYNN DECILO–STAFF

At the end of my junior year of college, I felt I had mapped out a solid plan for the future. I had done lots of praying for divine direction, and a number of ideas coalesced into a unified plan. In the fall of my senior year, I applied for opportunities for the summer after graduation, as well as for my first job out of school. They seemed necessary steps along my intended career path. (My career goal is to be a US Foreign Service officer.) 

Jamey stands outside of The Christian Science Publishing Society.

But one week in January, I received e-mails from both of the programs I had applied to informing me that they had received thousands more applications than they had positions, and that I was one of the many who had not made the cut. Although both e-mails were quick to say that I should apply again in the future, and that their “no” letters were not a reflection of my qualifications, I was crushed, especially since both messages had arrived so close together. They felt like twin sledgehammer blows that had shattered my vision for the future. This was especially difficult because the steps I’d taken had all felt so right and divinely inspired. Not only that, but I was fearful, knowing that I needed to find something to do for the summer. 