My Experience

About a year and a half before coming to Christian Science I joined a Congregational Church. Not with the feeling that I was a Christian, nor understanding clearly how to become one; but I had determined to try to lead a higher, purer life, and felt that joining the church would be a step in that direction, and trusted that being obedient to that thought, the next step in the right direction would be shown me.

My thought in regard to the relation between God and man at that time was something like this. I saw some among my friends and acquaintances who seemed to be earnest Christians, and appeared to be a great deal more peaceful, contented, and happy than I was. They seemed to be able to find something in religion that satisfied them while I could not, although I wanted to, and had made attempts at different times to do so. Then I wondered why it was that some persons so naturally turned to God and seemed to find happiness, while others (myself included) were unable to find God or happiness, although they were satisfied that they did not experience as much happiness in life as their religious friends. Then the thought came to me that if God was all—powerful, all the conditions and circumstances which seemed to exist must be as He wanted them. In other words, God had created some natures that turned naturally to Him, and others that turned away from Him; and these two opposite natures must have been just as God wanted them, inasmuch as He was all—powerful, for if anything was not as God wanted it, He had only to speak the word and it was changed. Therefore, whether a Christian or not, I must have been just as God wanted me. And it must be conceded that if God is the only Creator, and has all—power, then every thing, every condition, every circumstance, must be exactly as He wants it, for it is impossible to conceive of any power or influence being able to mar, retard, or obstruct the work of Omnipotence, Omnipresence, and Omniscience.

September 27, 1900

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