Finding the perfect man

Originally appeared on

“I had wanted a man in my life,” a senior friend of mine was saying. We were talking about relationships. Years ago, she was a single woman, very involved with her career as a journalist for about 20 years, when she began to feel the need to marry. The problem was she just couldn’t find anyone she really liked. Every time she dated, there was always something wrong with the match.

Finally she decided to call a Christian Science practitioner to help her pray about the situation. The practitioner, who knew her family history, made a discerning statement: “You have accepted a disappointed sense of manhood.”

The words were totally unexpected and very surprising, yet immediately my friend knew they were true. She had been disappointed - in her dad - who began to drink more and more heavily, subsequently losing his job and putting the children in a position of having to find ways to support themselves. Now my friend was a journalist, covering criminal court, so she was seeing plenty more examples of “disappointing men.” Up to this point, she hadn’t fully seen man in the light of divine Truth, made in the image and likeness of God, naturally and wholly good (see Gen 1:26, 31). She was seeing just what was on the surface—this distorted view of manhood that was shaping what she believed to be true about men. And she was believing this picture.

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