Have you ever found yourself thinking, "Oh, if only ..."? If only I didn't have this physical difficulty, or a problem with my weight, or financial trouble. If only I had a better job. This kind of thinking is not as harmless as it may seem, since it is a virtual affirmation that we have no control over the circumstances that confront us. And to fantasize solutions to our problems is to waste precious opportunities to do the kind of constructive thinking that can bring real progress.

How much more productive and uplifting is the deep, prayerful desire to express in our lives the spiritual dominion, true health, and harmony that come from God. Through prayer we can begin to realize something of the omnipotent law of God; for God is divine Principle, having the power to deliver mankind from every kind of trouble. Speaking of God as the proven Principle of scientific mental healing, Mrs. Eddy states in Science and Health, "This apodictical Principle points to the revelation of Immanuel, 'God with us,'—the sovereign ever-presence, delivering the children of men from every ill 'that flesh is heir to.' " ^{Science and Health, p. 107.}

When Christ Jesus silently or audibly communed with God, he indulged in no vain fantasies about the sick and the sinners who turned to him for healing. With definitive power and authority he realized the kingdom of God, or presence and reign of God, within the one in need. We might say that he saw the individual who sought healing as spiritual, therefore already complete, healthy, and whole. He fed multitudes, healed, raised the dead, by understanding the truth, including the fact that the activity of divine Love and Life is ongoing, unceasing. Such breadth of spiritual realization brings salvation to the human condition.

There is a verse from the Bible that calls me up short when I find myself merely imagining a solution to a difficulty instead of praying for healing. It's from Ecclesiastes: "Vanity of vanities; all is vanity." ^{Eccl. 1:2.} Then I reflect on the commandment that forbids us to take God's name in vain. I can see that the "if only's" and the "I wish's" are the carnal mind's counterfeits of prayer. They are aimless yearnings without spiritual conviction or direction—and with no expectation of fulfillment.

The sense of failure symbolized in the thought "if only" shows us the need to be committed to a way of life that is more Christly. And sometimes specific sin may cause our freedom to appear remote or even unattainable. If healing seems elusive, we can look within our own consciousness to discover the motives of the heart. Honest evaluation of our thinking will uncover any tendency to ally hope and faith with merely temporal means. Overcoming this inclination, we will be free to experience the regenerative effect of God's grace.

A few years ago my husband and I needed to sell our house. Although we had found another house for our family, we had no buyer for the present one. And we felt the pressure and fear that can rise up at such a time. I was tempted to think, "If only someone would buy our house quickly and take away all the uncertainty of schedules and finances." Instead I prayed diligently to understand the true meaning of home. The Glossary of Science and Health defines "Jerusalem" in its spiritual sense as "home, heaven"; ^{Science and Health, p. 589.} and "heaven" in this way: "Harmony; the reign of Spirit; government by divine Principle; spirituality; bliss; the atmosphere of Soul." ^{Ibid., p. 587.}

In my prayer I identified some of the spiritual qualities—such as peace, beauty, and security—that characterize the home in which the children of God reside. In view of the clear understanding of home I was gaining through prayer, I wondered if in this instance some undisclosed sin was the impediment. A Christian Science practitioner assured me that if my motive was to heal and to bless, God would reveal the error to me.

One day we learned that another family had turned in an excellent offer on the house that we were considering. My desire was that God's blessing be experienced by all concerned. But as I sat down to study the Bible Lesson in the Christian Science Quarterly, my thought was in such turmoil, the mental argument for failure and discord was so strong, that I had to read aloud the statements of truth contained in the Bible and Science and Health.

Suddenly the sin that had remained hidden showed itself clearly. I recalled having been critical when others had failed to sell their house before buying another. There it was! Self-righteousness in the guise of good judgment.

But then I realized that each of us is truly the spiritual child of God, created in the divine likeness, full of grace and mercy and sound judgment. I saw that those sinful thoughts had never really been a part of my thinking, because God is the one real Mind and true consciousness reflects only the divine. With an abiding sense of divine Love's unerring control of all life, I began to understand that there is no immovable obstacle to our present demonstration of the harmony and security that God provides for us.

A few minutes later a young woman telephoned and asked to come by. She returned with her husband that evening to buy our house. While they were there, a telephone call brought word that the family which had made the offer on the house we were interested in had decided to withdraw it. They had found another house that better met their needs.

For me the greatest blessing of this experience was the realization that whenever problems are solved in human affairs through prayer, healing is brought about by the gaining of a correct understanding of spiritual reality. When we learn what is spiritually true about ourselves, the restrictive effects of error are removed. Wishing for a new home, better health, or a good job can never accomplish what the true good of consecrated prayer can. Communion with God brings a conviction that we too can pray with a measure of the authority Jesus employed in his ministry. We can relinquish sin and the fantasies of the carnal mind, and realize the presence and omnipotence of God.