When a girl stole my best friend

I am so grateful for a healing I had of hateful feelings toward a girl I knew in school.

I’d had a best friend in grade school. But then this girl that I came to dislike pushed her way into the role of my best friend’s bestie. Their friendship continued through high school, excluding me completely. I hated that she had become my former best friend’s best friend and that I felt left behind and left out. I had a few friends in high school but kept mostly to myself. 

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After high school, I thought of this girl once in a while, and every time I did, my thoughts were still negative. I couldn’t get over my anger and hurt.

I thought of this girl once in a while, and every time I did, my thoughts were always negative. I couldn’t get over my anger and hurt.

I don’t know when it happened, but as I studied Christian Science, I realized it wasn’t right to hold on to these negative feelings. I knew that it was possible to change the way I thought about her, and I committed to doing that. I started to see her the way I’d learned that God sees her: gentle, caring, kind, and a good friend. I know that this is how God sees her because it’s how He sees all of us. God is good and made us to be like Him—good and loving.

I also thought about my reasons for letting go of my hurt and anger. A hymn from the Christian Science Hymnal puts it so well: “Love one another,—word of revelation; / Love frees from error’s thrall,—Love is liberation” (Margaret Morrison, No. 179, alt. © CSBD).

When we love, it actually helps us feel free. I wanted that feeling way more than any of the negative ones. And Jesus said that we should love our neighbor as ourselves (see Matthew 19:19). 

These ideas helped me let go of my negative thoughts about this girl, and the old resentment and hurt were replaced by peace.

The old resentment and hurt were replaced by peace.

About fifteen years later, I saw her again. We chatted, and I made an effort to think kind thoughts about her. I didn’t think much about her after that. 

Then one day, out of the blue she called me. She was friendly and warm, asking if I wanted to get together. I was shocked. This girl had never paid any attention to me in high school, and we hadn’t been in touch since we last saw each other. I knew that this was God, Love, in action—and that I was able to receive this blessing as a direct result of allowing Love to change my thoughts about her. 

I am so grateful for our new friendship and the healing power of love and forgiveness.

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