Julio Rivas, Father and Christian Science practitioner
For me, womanhood stands for strength. My mother faced troubles in our home with deep spiritual strength. She said, “I don't know how we're going to afford your college education. But God is going to provide it.” You could feel her fierce determination, her deep-seated faith when she said that.
As a child, I realized that the founder of the Church of Christ, Scientist — Mary Baker Eddy — was a woman who faced great adversity in a patriarchal society. She was another example, to me, of strong womanhood — the womanhood that represents a spiritual quality that God gives to everyone, not just females.
Christian Science has helped me understand God as both Mother and Father. What a freeing thought that is! It's a beautiful counterbalance to know that strength in manhood is right but that there's also strength in womanhood — in allowing loving and nurturing elements to come through.
I feel grateful I can express loving and nurturing qualities as a Christian Science practitioner. I also spend lots of time with our children. We have a full-time nanny, but I love to take the kids to the thousand and one things that they need to go to. I'm a nurturer, because God has given me that ability. What I do as a father and what I do as a practitioner includes expressing the motherhood of God. That touches my heart.
My wife works full time — and often has to teach at night. That means that many times it's my responsibility to bathe and feed the children in the evening and to put them to bed. I also do homework with them, read to them, play with them. This takes place in a very natural, happy way, as I am sure it does in the lives of many men.
When my wife accepted a job in California and we moved here, she was in an environment full of men — CPAs, financial analysts. What came to her was this: the one God, the source of all light and intelligence, not only unifies people but also equalizes the sexes. Science and Health says, “One infinite God, good, unifies men and nations; constitutes the brotherhood of man; ends wars; fulfils the Scripture, ‘Love thy neighbor as thyself;’ annihilates pagan and Christian idolatry,— whatever is wrong in social, civil, criminal, political, and religious codes; equalizes the sexes; annuls the curse on man, and leaves nothing that can sin, suffer, be punished or destroyed” (p. 340 ).
My wife has been able to do her job successfully — not by becoming harsh or acting according to a male stereotype — but by being a woman who expresses joy and nurturing. When she rose to become supervisor of the men she worked with, her boss said, “You have stood out.” Her approach was conducive to building the team and moving it forward.
For years, my wife suffered from severe menstrual cramps. One day, she realized she'd bought into the assumption that men are often victimizers and women are their victims. She saw that the womanhood of God was never a victim. In fact, the womanhood of God is an equal partner to the manhood of God. They combine as one. Therefore, her real womanhood was God-based, full of authority from God. Full of freedom. As she got that insight, all of a sudden the pain left. She never suffered from menstrual cramps again.
Every woman has the God-given right to reach her full potential. This means freedom for men as well. Men are often unaware that they've been put in social straightjackets where they feel pressured into conforming to certain types of behavior toward women. But if men know they can be more than what a traditional social role assigns to them, they see their opportunity to nurture others, to bless others. They can negotiate a contract less out of greed or a desire to dominate and more from the standpoint of reaching common goals for everyone. It won't be a matter of the male having to protect what he has because otherwise the women might take it away. It will be a mutual growing experience, with greater freedom and blessing for both genders.
