Searching for a job–and finding forgiveness

Originally appeared on

“Mom, Robbie just hit me,” my seven-year-old son Chris complained. Robbie then told me the same story about Chris. “Well,” I said, “it sounds like you both need to forgive each other.” Immediately they turned to each other, said, “I’m sorry!” then ran down the stairs and returned to playing as if nothing had happened.

Young children seem to have a knack for easily forgiving and quickly reestablishing a happy friendship. Unfortunately, that’s not always true for adults. Unkind words, misunderstanding, or unfair treatment, like the weeds in a neglected garden, can take over and turn into resentment, hate, or revenge.

Forgiving these misdeeds can seem like the hardest thing to do—forgiving others and especially forgiving ourselves. But how do we do this when we feel we have been greatly wronged or abused? Human willpower simply is not enough, so how do we lift ourselves from the vicious cycle of ruminating over past hurts?

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