Over a year ago, I was alarmed by a lump that appeared on my chest, accompanied by pain. I had a few guesses as to what it might be labeled medically, but I knew that whatever it was did not belong there. Despite my awareness of this development, I was timid about addressing it and tempted to simply ignore it. Every night when I crawled into bed, however, I felt immensely fearful about it. I would try pushing the fear away with platitudes or nice-sounding ideas about God, but I knew this was just putting off dealing with the problem.

After some time, I got real with myself and admitted that sincere spiritual work was needed if I wanted to be healed. That night as I was attempting to fall asleep and felt fear return, I bolted upright in bed and decided not to ignore the pain any longer. Feeling a newfound courage and willingness to tackle the issue, I turned to God in prayer.

I knew I needed to overcome not only fear but guilt. I was quite concerned about what might happen if the problem grew worse, and I also felt at fault, as though I had somehow caused the problem. With a desire to be free from these feelings, I searched the Bible, Science and Health with Key to the Scriptures and other writings by Mary Baker Eddy, and the Christian Science Hymnal for healing truths. I read many passages and verses until I came upon ideas that rang true for me. I would jot them down and meditate on them. With each good idea I wrote down, an opposite claim would flare up as if to challenge it. This wrestling was tiring, but in the midst of the battle, a whisper of courage persisted: “Keep going.”