Article April 15, 2002 Issue

'Thou hast turned my mourning into dancing ...'

... in a moment of great visual beauty, the invisible and constant are seen and felt.

with contributions from Anne Early, Katherine Hildreth

My mother passed on last year quite unexpectedly. I was extremely close to her. She lived right behind us in a house she'd built less than a year before. She was a daily part of my life and my children's lives. Our lives were indelibly intertwined.

After the first night of immeasurable sadness, feeling as though I would never get over this loss, I made a decision. I decided that although everything around me was shouting, "There has been a death! Your mother has died!" I was going to be an advocate for life. In this world we have plenty that advocates for the harsh reality of death. We're bombarded with graphic images of death. I didn't feel I'd ever find healing within this view of things. I believe deeply in the eternality of life and that life has a divine source.

So, I reasoned, all that life contains, and all that my mother's life contained, could not die, could never end, and that actually rather than being an ending, there was a continuation—a continuation of good. Good continuing for my mother. Good continuing for my family and me. Nothing could be taken from us. I went forward that week with this conviction, my children and I looking for promises of the continuity of good.

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'Thou hast turned my mourning into dancing ...'

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