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Afraid of heights? Who says?
Several years ago my husband and I planned a trip to the Grand Canyon, where we would ride mules down to the bottom. It was my job to make our reservations over the phone. I called, and the first thing the woman on the other end said was, “If you’re afraid of heights or large animals, you should consider doing something else on your vacation.” Uh oh! I had always been afraid of heights. As a child, I could never climb trees. As an adult, I couldn’t stand at a window in a tall building without my stomach buckling. But I really wanted the experience of riding a mule down the Grand Canyon, so I told the woman, “I’ll get back to you.”
As a long-time student of Christian Science, I have developed the habit of prayerfully and humbly listening to God for a healing thought whenever a challenge arises. What came to me now, as clearly as a voice in my ear, was: “Afraid of heights? Who says?” As I thought about it, I could see that it was a limited sense of myself that was making that claim. My human sense of self declares, “I am female, five feet six inches tall, I have brown hair, I don’t like olives, I am afraid of heights … ” and so on. But what’s spiritually true is that I am the manifestation of God, wholly spiritual and free from the limited mortal concepts that would cheat me of my freedom and my joy.
Mary Baker Eddy, the Discoverer and Founder of Christian Science, has a great deal to say about our true spiritual identity in her book Science and Health with Key to the Scriptures. On page 552 she writes: “Human experience in mortal life, which starts from an egg, corresponds with that of Job, when he says, ‘Man that is born of a woman is of few days, and full of trouble.’ Mortals must emerge from this notion of material life as all-in-all. They must peck open their shells with Christian Science, and look outward and upward.” Earlier in the book, she notes: “The real man is spiritual and immortal, but the mortal and imperfect so-called ‘children of men’ are counterfeits from the beginning, to be laid aside for the pure reality. This mortal is put off, and the new man or real man is put on, in proportion as mortals realize the Science of man and seek the true model” (p. 409).
Praying along these lines, I could see that a fear of heights never had anything to do with the real me. I also took comfort in a biblical admonition: “Cease ye from man, whose breath is in his nostrils: for wherein is he to be accounted of?” (Isaiah 2:22). As I pondered and cherished these truths, all sense of concern completely vanished from my thought. I confidently called back and made reservations.
When the day approached, we headed for the Grand Canyon. Very early on a cold morning, with a fresh blanket of snow covering the ground, we joined a small group of people, some of whom had come great distances to share this experience. As we were helped onto our mules, I felt completely at ease, not even apprehensive. Yes, the mules do walk right on the edge of the narrow path, and yes, it really is a mile down to the bottom—but it didn’t bother me a bit. In fact, that mule ride turned out to be a glorious experience that I often think of with joy, and with gratitude for the freedom gained. Today, I can honestly say I have no trouble with heights, which is especially helpful since now I can climb up on the furniture when necessary, such as when we’re decorating the Christmas tree, with no problem at all.
The more we learn of Truth through the study of Christian Science, the more we are able to leave fears behind and claim our God-given freedom. When the impositions of limited material thinking present themselves, we can confidently declare, “Who says? Not me. That is no part of me, and it never has been.”
—Carolyn Knee, San Francisco, California